Verboticism: Guidunce

'Eat! Or you'll turn into a boneless chicken.'

DEFINITION: n., Cautionary advice provided by parents to their children, often makes no logical sense but carries enough emotional weight to affect the child's behavior. v. To warn of danger through the judicious use of exaggeration.

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Humumbug

vixphilia

Created by: vixphilia

Pronunciation: hum-MUM-bug

Sentence: Mum was feding me her usual humumbug: "If you keep making ugly faces,it will freeze like that!"

Etymology: Humbug: pretentious or silly talk Mum: Mother

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Lorewarning

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: lor/war/ning

Sentence: Lorewarning is the practice of raising children by indoctrinating them with urban legends.

Etymology: lore (myths, folklore) + forewarning

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Alligators in the sewers? - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 06:06:00

Witches eat little kids who don't go to bed on time? - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:33:00

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Causham

Created by: Rehlit

Pronunciation: kaw-sham

Sentence: Many parents use an insidious causham to frighten their naughty children. Such as "If you eat watermelon seeds, a watermelon will grow in your stomach!"

Etymology: Caution(a warning against danger or evil; anything serving as a warning) + sham (something that is not what it purports to be; a spurious imitation; fraud or hoax; pretended; counterfeit; feigned:)

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Awedition

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: aw/dish/un

Sentence: Parents awedition their children because it is a fast, easy way to get the behaviour they expect. Unfortunately, when children are put through too many aweditions and are older, they do not trust anything their parents tell them.

Etymology: awe (fear)+ condition

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COMMENTS:

sounds like something a teacher might do - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-28: 11:59:00

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Madvice

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: mad/vice

Sentence: Yeah he was at it again. Dad, flappin' his chops about how he "had to walk a mile to school in the snow," "shine shoes for lunch money" and "wear grandpa's suit jacket to his 8th grade graduation." Patrick learned to tune both Dad AND Mom out the day he realized they were offering nothing but useless madvice once they started digging into their, "WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE" files.

Etymology: mad + advice. Parents short fuse when it comes to their "spoiled brats" whining...

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COMMENTS:

Amen...but of course we do the same things to our own kids...When I was in school, talk about computers was pure science fiction...why they had barely invented tv's or phones that weren't party lines! Cheers,lumina - Nosila, 2008-08-29: 20:08:00

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Behaviorelseoid

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: bee-HAY-vee-uhr-ELSE-ohyd

Sentence: " I can tell if you're lying - just by feeling your nose." I told little Tommy. With a scream of terror he covered his face like a three foot tall Bela Lugosi and ran home crying. My use of a common BEHAVIORELSEOID works every time, flushing out little untruths wherever they might be lurking. The incident was witnessed by little Laura, who later explained that "There are more blood vessels in the nose." Although there may be some guilt associated with the use of BEHAVIORELSEOIDS in modern childrearing, experts have justified it's use as a potent counterbalance to "freezer experiments", "suspiciously quiet bedrooms" and hilariously blantant lies. By the way, why are there eleven eggs in the fridge and one in the hedges? Someone was trying to HATCH one, weren't they? Come on, let me feel your nose.....

Etymology: BEHAVIor+OR ELSE+ -OID= BEHAVIORELSEOID BEHAVIOR:the manner of conducting oneself ,anything that an organism or urchin does involving action and response to stimulation or uncertainty -alteration of Middle English behavour, from behaven.....OR ELSE: idiom meaning "Regardless of any extenuating circumstances- and I MEAN IT!".....-OID:suffix - something resembling an object or having a (specified) quality of fear inducing behavior modification.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Q: What do Fred Sanford, Augie Doggie, Chuck Connors and Fred MacMurray have in common?.........................A: http://www.tvdads.com/tvdads.shtml - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 07:52:00

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Exaggerisk

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: ex - aj - ur - isk

Sentence: Shelly tended to exaggerisk when she talked to her boys about the dangers lurking in the neighborhood. She was a bit paranoid after seeing the movie about vampires infiltrating rural towns where they might go unnoticed.

Etymology: exaggerate, risk

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COMMENTS:

artr Mom is just making sure her kids are exaggeready. - artr, 2010-01-20: 12:31:00

There's a New Moon at Twilight! - Nosila, 2010-01-20: 19:23:00

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Scarefication

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skair-uh-fi-key-shuhn

Sentence: Mother hen believes in the use of scarefication to keep her chicks in line. A little lie here, an exaggeration there, all pecked into their little psyches until they are afraid to do anything wrong.

Etymology: scare (to fill, especially suddenly, with fear or terror; frighten; alarm) Scarification (scratching, etching, burning/branding, or superficially cutting designs, pictures, or words into the skin as a permanent body modification)

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Hegglestion

Created by: frenchprof

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Hegglestion noted, the philosopher cracked up.

Etymology: comes from Hegel a famous philosopher.

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Badmonition

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: bad-mo-ni-shun

Sentence: Know for her dark predictions, Grandma offered another of her badmonitions when she told us that eating too much candy would stunt our growth.

Etymology: bad + admonition

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