Verboticism: Pollytechnique

'I think Uncle Mikey taught our parrot a new word!'

DEFINITION: v. To leave your pet, child or lover in the care of a friend or relative who teaches them a stupid trick or bad habit. n. A stupid trick or bad habit learned from a caregiver.

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Pollytechnique

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Lolmodel

Created by: OllyBiss

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Cluckaktua

Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation: kluhk-kE-tu-wa

Sentence:

Etymology: 1) Cluck: the sound made by a hen (as in calling her chicks) 2) Kakaktua or 'cockatoo': from the Malay name for these birds, kaka(k)tua (either from kaka "parrot" + tuwah, or "older sister" from kakak "sister" + tua, "old").

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COMMENTS:

Alternative spelling: 'Cluckatoo'. - logarithm, 2008-12-11: 00:03:00

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Anticsrudeshow

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: an tix rood sho

Sentence: With no other babysitting options when she left town on business trips, Marcie had no choice but to live with the anticsrudeshow than ensued after her kids went to stay with her elderly Aunt FiFi. Aunt FiFi was ancient but spry, had never wed, and among other things, had travelled the world, been mistress to many famous and notorious men and entertained in burlesque in Vegas and Atlantic City in her checkered career. From her, Marcie's 5 year old daughter and 7 year old son had learned how to shoot craps, read the racing handicaps, mix martinis extra dry, swear like troopers, dance the Charleston and tango, load a derringer, and had watched every mob movie ever made. They had learned to say a lot of new words in Sicilian, spell "Witness Relocation Program" and knew that "RICO" stood for Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act. Yes, Show and Tell days at school after visits to Aunt Fifi were always riotous and resulted in Marcie's being called to the Principal's Office. Marcie thought that the word describing those days should have been called "Aunticsrudeshowandtell" instead!

Etymology: antics (a ludicrous or grotesque act done for fun) & rude (socially incorrect behaviour) & show (a public exhibition or entertainment) & Antiques Road Show (showing off something old whose value is relative and usually not worth as much to others.

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COMMENTS:

Wow, clever creation and amusing story! Was Aunt Fifi inspired by Auntie Mame, perhaps? - Tigger, 2008-02-26: 02:07:00

great story - Jabberwocky, 2008-02-26: 11:43:00

Clever and funny story! Anyhow, it could have been worse: imagine if Beavis & Butthead were Marie's only choice as baby-sitters! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 15:59:00

Admire the inventiveness of your word and the play on the tv show! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:46:00

Cheers, my friends and in the words of the show....How much do you think it's worth?.... - Nosila, 2008-02-26: 22:15:00

Tigger, I think it was spelled Auntie Maim in this case... - Nosila, 2008-02-26: 22:52:00

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Pollytechnique

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pol lee tek neek

Sentence: When Uncle Mikey babysat the Miller's parrot on their annual vacation, she usually learned a new pollytechnique. This year Polly added 3 new swear words to her vocabulary. These words only seemed to be used when the easily-offended were around. You just cannot unteach an old bird new tricks...

Etymology: Polly (common name for a parrot) I Technique (skillfulness in the command of fundamentals deriving from practice and familiarity) & word play on Polytechnic (a technical school offering instruction in many industrial arts and applied sciences)

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Uncooltomfoolery

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: un-cool-tom-foo-la-ree

Sentence: what uncooltomfoolery is this? I leave you in your uncle's care for just 1 day and he has set about untraining the good habits we instilled in you. Now scrub off that ridiculous tattoo and put the bottle back in the wine rack.

Etymology: uncool (not approved) + uncle (someone often entrusted to care for nieces and nephews) + tomfoolery (nonsense) + uncle tom (yes i have one of those)

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Unclewd

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: əngkəloōd

Sentence: The kids loved it when Uncle Lew came to visit or to babysit. Cindy is a bit hesitant to ask him to watch the kids. She was never sure what unclewd trick or stunt he would teach them. Last time it was **pull my finger** for the 2-year-old. The time before that, Michael Jackson-style crotch grabs for the 4-year-old. What next?

Etymology: uncle (the brother of one*s father or mother or the husband of one\'s aunt) + lewd (crude and offensive in a sexual way)

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Cawrupt

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: caw rupt

Sentence: My biggest pollygripe about picking up my pet parrot,Polly Walnuts, from my brother after my vacation was to find that he tried to cawrupt the Gullible bird. Instead of saying his usual "Polly wanna cracker", my brother taught him to swear and to answer the phone and impersonate others. He'd say his name was Capt.Jack Sparrow or Peter Finch or Walter Pigeon or Bird Reynolds or Jay Leno or Dan Quail or Denny Crane or Robin Leach or Russell Crow or Feather Locklear or Placido Flamingo. He also taught him rude sentences like, "Come over and I'll show you a cockatoo" or "You should see the big Parakeets in the next cage" and "You're a Raven Loonatic". One thing about birds is that you cannot unteach them to say something once it is wired into their tiny brains on a Condor that they aren't too Swift and that is something that is very hard to Swallow!

Etymology: corrupt (alter from the original;place under suspicion or cast doubt upon; containing errors or alterations)& Caw (a sound made by birds)

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COMMENTS:

That gave your parrot something to crow about. - Mustang, 2008-12-10: 22:48:00

This is funny....got my vote... - mweinmann, 2008-12-11: 18:27:00

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Contrargiver

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kon/trer/giv/er

Sentence: "Every time I'm left with that @%&dam !@#$%&* contrargiver brother of yours, I come back with !@#$%&* awful language like this," lamented Fudgy, my beloved parakeet.

Etymology: contrary + caregiver

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COMMENTS:

Great etymology! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:28:00

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Facturb

Created by: Haydon

Pronunciation: fac- turb

Sentence: Bobby facturb his little sister when he babysat her.

Etymology: Fac-to make turb- disturb

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Zootard

Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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