Verboticism: Conerapy

'So how are you adjusting to married life?'

DEFINITION: v. To compensate for lack of love, attention and/or sexual favors by buying things, lots of things. n. An object purchased to compensate for sexual dawdling.

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Conerapy

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Foodiddle

Created by: wordmeister

Pronunciation: foo-did-le

Sentence: After 17 and half hours of abstinence, Seymour was about ready to jump out of his pants, so rather than attacking his boss – for some bizarre reason she was getting more and more attractive by the second – he went downstairs fooddidled himself with brand new cravat. And as the afternoon wore on, he simply tightened the loop around his neck whenever the urge returned. Sadly none of his coworkers noticed, until it was too late...

Etymology: fool ( or faux) + diddle

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Purchaste

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (v., adj.) pər-ˈchāst, (n)ˈpər-ˈchas-tə-tē

Sentence: When Aaron married, he didn't realize that he was accepting a vow of purchastity that would result in an monstrous Visa balance and a poor credit rating.

Etymology: pur[chase] + chastity

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Masterbysion

Created by: pungineer

Pronunciation: master-buy-shun

Sentence: Poor Steve had been in a fulfilling heterosexual relationship for so long his only sexual outlet was popping down to his local hardware megastore for some much needed masterbysion in the extendable tool aisle

Etymology: i'll let you all rack your brains to figure this one out...

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COMMENTS:

masterfull - Jabberwocky, 2008-06-05: 15:48:00

He might have been looking for a lathe? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-06-05: 23:45:00

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Sexersatz

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: sex-er-sats

Sentence: Jill wondered why Jack was converting their den into a gym to put all his sexersatz equipment. Everytime he went to the mall he was buying more weights.

Etymology: sex: (tee-hee)+ exercise: some men will use exercise as a way to channel their tensions and frustrations + ersatz: an inferior substitute

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Buybuylove

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: by by luv

Sentence: Buybuylove, buybuy happiness. Hello loneliness, I think I'm-a gonna cry. ByBuybuylove, buybuy sweet caress. Hello emptiness, I feel like I could die. buybuylove, goodbuy. (With apologies to the Everly Bros.)

Etymology: Buy Buy (purchase, shop, purchase, shop) Love (affection,fondness,a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction)

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Sublimitlessmation

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: sub/limit/less/may/shun

Sentence: To take his mind off his on again off again relationship Sam resorted to sublimitlessmation and maxed out four credit cards in the process.

Etymology: sublimation (divert the energy of a primitve impulse) + limitless

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Dotcompensate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dot com pen sate

Sentence: Eddie lived a hermitic existance in a basement bedroom in his parents' house. He had no life other than that lived through his best friend, his computer. He called her Della, because she was a Dell, the romantic fool. Everyday he showered her with things he bought for her on e-bay and amazon and every imagineable shopping website. A fancy mousepad here, a scanner there, software programs to last her a lifetime. In other words, he dotcompensated for the fact that she was the only female who responded to him. Oh sure, sometimes she would freeze up if he had spoken harshly to her or she'd need her hard drive tweaked. To show his affection, he would go straight to a new site and order her something nice to make her happy. Yes, Eddie was one lonely geek, who's mother ever dispared of becoming a granny!

Etymology: dot.com (A company whose business is based around a website) & compensate (adjust or make up for;make up for shortcomings or a feeling of inferiority by exaggerating;the act of furnishing an equivalent thing in the place of another)

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COMMENTS:

love it! - galwaywegian, 2008-06-05: 05:35:00

excellent around. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-06-05: 23:42:00

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Purchosexual

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: pur-cho-SEK-shoo-uhl

Sentence: Roxie never had the slightest intention of consummating her marriage to Bob. After all, think of the danger: children are expensive, leaving little for spend-ups on yourself. Initially, naturally, Bob raised objections to the idea, but gradually she made him see the 'wisdom of her ways. What's more realizing that he had plenty of money to indulge himself with, he began splurging with a red hot passion in procuring the most exotic screws. Still, at times, he did feel that he had been toolshedded; though life was certainly not without its ups and downs as a purchosexual.

Etymology: PURCH of purchase & SEXUAL, as in metrosexual, retrosexual, fauxmosexual. Cognate:purchosexuality

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COMMENTS:

love the sound of this and a great funny sentence - Jabberwocky, 2008-06-05: 15:50:00

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Buysexual

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bīsekshoōəl

Sentence: Now that they are married Jason's wife seems quite a bit less interested in intimate time. This is how Jason discovered that he is a buysexual. The only thing overheated in this relationship is their credit account.

Etymology: buy (obtain in exchange for payment) + sexual (activities connected with physical attraction or intimate physical contact between individuals)

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COMMENTS:

The LGBT society just got bigger - scrabbelicious, 2012-01-09: 11:43:00

The LGBT society just got bigger - scrabbelicious, 2012-01-09: 11:44:00

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Lacksexumer

carlosrizo

Created by: carlosrizo

Pronunciation: lack-sex-sumer

Sentence:

Etymology: Lack (absence) Sex Sumer (from consumer)

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