Verboticism: Phantofiles

'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Phantofiles

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Documentality

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dok u men tal it ee

Sentence: Pierre's ruse was to use his documentality to elude real work. He would carry any official-looking folder or paper to make it look like he was on his way to a very important meeting. In fact, he remembered the trick his English classes used about the different words "stationary & stationery". The "ar" one stood for At Rest, as in stationary machinery and the other "er" one stood for the last 2 letters in paper...or in his case "Eternally Roving".

Etymology: Document (writing that provides information (especially information of an official nature); anything serving as a representation of a person's thinking by means of symbolic marks) & Mentality (a habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations; mental ability)

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Assumetote

Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: as OOM tot

Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!

Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))

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COMMENTS:

yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00

Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00

you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00

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Escaperwork

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ess-KAY-pur-wurk

Sentence: Just before weekly staff meetings, Joe's pile of escaperwork would grow to include three reports, two manila envelopes, a stapler and a large black binder labelled 'URGENT'.

Etymology: escape (to avoid) + paperwork (documents)

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Fauxport

Created by: cpeterc

Pronunciation: Fo - Port

Sentence: "Wait - I'll never make it past Mr. Big's office without a Fauxport, This folder will do."

Etymology: Faux = faxe or simulated Port from Passport a document that allows you to travel freely.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Your papers, please.... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:48:00

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Work-o-the-wisprop

Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: wohrk-oh-thuh-wiz-prop

Sentence: Oh god, that Ben has been such a work-o-the-wispropper ever since he started out in the business of being the business supervisor. The work-o-the-wisprop he carried around were very convincing: papers to be signed, a neat brown folder and a clipboard with Transformers scribbles on it.

Etymology: will-o-the-wisp [illusion] + work + prop + wiz [the best at something e.g. a math wiz]

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COMMENTS:

good one! - pguse, 2007-06-13: 10:04:00

thanks. :D - ohwtepph, 2007-06-13: 10:28:00

It's a good one and I voted for you! - Stevenson0, 2007-06-13: 17:36:00

How did you get that punctuation in there? - mplsbohemian, 2007-06-13: 19:43:00

you can work all sorts of magic if you go into 'oops i want to change the spelling' bit of the edit section.... it makes things much more verbsatile - rikboyee, 2007-06-13: 22:23:00

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Fauxsimile

Created by: ryanpetie

Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay

Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'

Etymology: faux/facsimile

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Fillusion

protothor

Created by: protothor

Pronunciation: fillusion

Sentence: This fillusion is working very well; no one even expects I'm not doing anything.

Etymology: From 'file' and 'illusion', anything that gives an observer the idea that you're preoccupied.

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Fileusion

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Portfonio

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: port - pfon - eeeooo

Sentence: Robert held tight to his large portfonio as he passed his manager's office. He really had nothing to do but he nicely played the part of a person who had millions of things to do and people to see.

Etymology: Portfolio - A collection of papers and accomplishment and another word for notebook. + phony (not real).

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Fobject

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: fob-jekt

Sentence: Shuffling papers whilst wearing my glasses on the end of my nose is the most effective combination of fobjects I have found. It creates the illusion that I'm actually doing what I'm paid to do.

Etymology: Fob -(as in 'fob off', deceive or dupe) + object = fobject

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COMMENTS:

Short and snappy - I could use this. :) - Discoveria, 2012-09-26: 12:14:00

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