Verboticism: Fauxpology

DEFINITION: v. To apologize for a belch, or the passing of gas, even though it is obvious that the action was done intentionally and with force. n. A person who apologizes insincerely for their burping or belching.
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Fauxpology
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Flatufabrication
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: flat-yew-fab-ruh-CAY-shun
Sentence: Though Clayton apologized for the very loud and obviously intentional (and offensively fragrant) emanation it was clear to all who knew him that his apology was a flatufabrication and that he was actually proud of his deed and delighted at the discomfort it caused those about him.
Etymology: Blend of 'flatulence' (The presence of excessive gas in the digestive tract) and 'fabrication' (something fabricated, esp. an untruthful statement)
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COMMENTS:
Ah,Clayton Flatuley...star of Liverdance and Lord of the Stanks! - Nosila, 2009-06-03: 10:35:00
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Regretulence
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: re gret yu lens
Sentence: Sarah hated eating with her brother Sid, as he delighted in torturing her with his bad manners. He'd make bizarre digestive noises at the table and then apologize insincerely for his actions. This regretulence was really annoying, as he would always blame their poor dog, lying under the table. This was also galling as the dog was never in the house at meal times!
Etymology: Regret (be sorry) & Flatulence (a state of excessive gas in the alimentary canal)
Gastrosintentional
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: gas tro sin ten shun all
Sentence: Jack always ate fiberful meals. He did it on purpose to be able to make disgusting bodily sounds, particularly when sitting next to pretty girls in the school cafeteria. He was gastrosintentional by nature and usually jumped up when expelling methane gas from his person. It is said he inspired the Rolling Stones to sing: "Jumping Jack Flash is a gas, gas, gas!"
Etymology: gastro (of the stomach/digestive processes) & sin (commit a faux pas or a fault or make a serious mistake) & Intentional (on purpose) & gastrointestinal (of or relating to the stomach and intestines)
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COMMENTS:
Brilliant! - Mustang, 2009-06-03: 07:51:00
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Conflatulation
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: con - flat - yew - LAY - shun
Sentence: Sergio's conflatulation was a mock apology that sounded more like self aggrandizement, a fact the self-satisfied smirk he wore substantiated.
Etymology: Blend of congratulation and flatulence
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COMMENTS:
wish I thought of that one! Great! - arrrteest, 2008-04-17: 07:26:00
Sergio and Jamie should sit beside one another and duel it out. - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-17: 08:41:00
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Expelch
Created by: abrakadeborah
Pronunciation: ex-pelch
Sentence: David was always the middle of an expelch at the dinner table, often causing his girlfriend to lose her appetite.
Etymology: Combined ~ Expel-discharge. & Belch-Burp.
Ruedischarge
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: roōdischärj
Sentence: Some people don’t understand why Robby doesn’t have a girlfriend. Some blame it on his propensity to ruedischarge at will in public settings. He can expel gas from almost any orifice. What girl wouldn’t want to snap up such a talented catch?
Etymology: rued (bitterly regret) + rude (offensively impolite or ill-mannered) + discharge (emit)
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Nospareagas
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: no sper a gass
Sentence: Rudy was aptly named. Being an immature twit, he took great delight in using bodily functions to offend people, especially his sister, Prissy. His favourite was anything to do with passing gas. He could summon expulsions from either his mouth or the end he sits on, at will. He had worked hard to develop this "skill" and thrilled to torture his sister with it. He figured he should be harnessed aa a natural resource. Of course he insincerely apologized first, but his policy of being a nospareagas ninja (not silent, but deadly) meant he could do it on demand, throughout the meal. Who needs wind power...he had it perfected. One night Prissy had had enough. She made the meal with cauliflour, beans, artichokes,onions, sprouts and ensured that his portion was liberally doused with parsley juice, bran and other fibres and crushed laxative pills. Oh yes, Rudy could have his fun at supper, but she would have the last laugh all through the long, long night!
Etymology: no ( used to express refusal or denial or disagreement etc or especially to emphasize a negative statement ) & spare (save or relieve from an experience or action ) & gas (attack with gas; subject to gas fumes) & asparagas (edible young shoots of the asparagus plant, after which digestion causes gas build-up and emanates a peculiar smell)
Apologasvert
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: up-ah-lo-gas-vert
Sentence: Ron's apologasvert we all expect at Thanksgiving dinner. We play musical chairs when it comes time to sit down for dinner...No one wants to sit next to him!
Etymology: apologize + gas + overt
Flatuluctant
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: flat-choo-luck-tunt
Sentence: Bill was flatuluctant when it came to eating at Burrito Barn. Mexican food was no reason hold back for the sake of manners. It was fiesta time for his digestion.
Etymology: flatulence+reluctant
Burpologuy
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: bərpäləgī
Sentence: Allen is not much of a white-collar guy. His world is not that of the prim and proper. No fine wine for him - cheap beer. He is just a burpologuy, belching with the force of a slap in the face followed by a duplicitous ”sorry”.
Etymology: burp (noisily release air from the stomach through the mouth; belch) + apology (a regretful acknowledgment of an offense or failure) + guy (a man)
