Verboticism: Mortifimpaired

'Omigod! What happened to you?'

DEFINITION: v. To injure yourself while performing a normal everyday activity, such bending down, standing up, or turning your head quickly. n. An self-inflicted injury which occurred during a period of physical inactivity.

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Mortifimpaired

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Chagrinjury

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: sha-GRIN-jry

Sentence: Elwood suffered yet another chagrinjury when he got his finger caught in the whisk attachment on his mixer, jerked the mixer off the counter wherein it fell on his toes, and while dancing about in pain knocked himself senseless when his head whacked into the open cupboard door.

Etymology: Blend of 'chagrin' (a feeling of vexation, marked by disappointment or humiliation) and 'injury'

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COMMENTS:

What a klutz! Good one. - Nosila, 2009-06-01: 14:37:00

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Pedestrain

Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Ped-est-rain

Sentence: Greg lived a very beige life and enjoyed it's banality. He went to work, did his grocery shopping and walked his dog. He occasionally visited family and had dinner with friends but that was the extent of his excitement. Greg was a cautious man who didn't want to get hurt, so no snow-boarding, rollerblading or motorbike riding for him. "Oh my god what happened to you?" blabbered his secretary Janine when he came in for work in casts one day. "I slipped down the stairs with my groceries when my dog ran passed me out the door. The detergent bottle I had bought burst open and I slid and fell all the way from the sixth floor to the foyer in the detergent." He said blandly. Janine burst out laughing. "And then I crashed into the floral display, which fell on me. The rose thorns got stuck in my skin." "Wow." Said Janine giggling. "That's a real pedestrain," but Greg didn't get it.

Etymology: Pedestrian - banal, boring, hum-drum, mundane, insipid and prosaic. Also referring to the boring act of walking somewhere.. Strain - injury usually induced by using a part of your body in a way it's not used to. Also happens when you're doing very little but doing it alot. I note that this verbotomy is found quite frequently on google due to the sad fact that many people can't spell pedestrian. I think that makes it all the more poignant.

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Freaccident

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: freek-seh-dent

Sentence: Being a wholly uncoordinated and clumsy oaf, Manfred seems to suffer one freaccident after another, goofy injuries that for anyone else would be very rare.

Etymology: Blend of 'freak' (A thing or occurrence that is markedly unusual or irregular) and 'accident' (an unforeseen and unplanned mishap)

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Ziplash

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: zip lash

Sentence: When Henry accidentally caught himself in the fly of his pants(ouch), he jerked his head down so quickly to see what he had done, that he gave himself ziplash.

Etymology: Zip (zipper, fly, fastener of clothing) & Whiplash (an injury to the neck as a result of rapid acceleration or deceleration)

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Workouch

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: wərkouch

Sentence: Every time Wendell goes to the gym to get in shape he ends up participating in a workouch. Its not that he doesn’t believe in warming up or starting slow and building up. He just doesn’t get that far. Last week he sprained his wrist opening the lock on his locker.

Etymology: workout (a session of vigorous physical exercise or training) + ouch (used to express pain)

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Incapassitate

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: in/ka/pass'/i/tate

Sentence: Brian told eveyone he had broken his leg by diving in front of a speeding car to save a small child. He was too embarrassed to admit he had incapassitated himself by tripping over a speed bump in the parking lot.

Etymology: incapacitate + ass

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-15: 10:50:00

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Dormident

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: dor/mi/dent

Sentence: Last week I went to bed perfectly normal, but sometime during the night I had a dormident and woke up with severe back pains and it took me fifteen minutes to get out of bed.

Etymology: dormant + accident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing something)- dormident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing nothing)

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Ouchpotato

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: owch pot ay to

Sentence: Dudley Dolittle was admitted to the ER with life-threatening (in his mind)injuries. He was innocently lying on the couch, watching Law & Order Special Victims Unit at 3:00 pm, just before The Office came on in double episode at 4:00 pm. When all of a sudden the remote fell on the floor. He reached over to grab it and fell off the couch, hitting his head and temporarily knocking himself out. When he regained conciousness, he got up off the floor to go look in the mirror at any possible bruises. Unfortunately, the cat had knocked over a vase filled with flowers and water and he slipped on the hardwood floor. When the ambulance came, Dudley was in major pain. Turns out he'd wrenched his back, broke his ankle and wrist. He'd turned from a Couchpotato into an Ouchpotato. Later, when asked what caused his injury, he was able to truthfully tell people that while on an undercover assignment, he was attacked when a wild cat hit him in his sweet peas, on his way to The Office. Sadly, he was believed...

Etymology: Ouch (hurt;wound;exclamation used to express pain) & Couch Potato (an idler who spends much time on a couch (usually watching television)

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Ordinowie

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: ôr'dn-ou'ē

Sentence: Kip couldn't believe the pain of the muscle strain in his lower back. He had been in fights and car wrecks, and had sufferred various wounds in them as well as during his stint as a military policeman in Saigon, but this was just an ordinowie-a channel-changing injury-he'd pulled his back reaching for the remote.

Etymology: 'Ord,' Army post in Monterey Bay, California; 'inow,' var. on the mantra of the know-it-all; 'ie,' abbr. for id est, latin, 'that is.'

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COMMENTS:

interesting ety, there! - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:12:00

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Idlejure

Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: ahyd-l-joor, ahyd-l-joor-ee

Sentence: How I managed to idlejure both my legs while folding laundry I'll never understand, but I guess that's the nature of idlejuries. One minute you're standing there minding your own business, the next you're in a body cast!

Etymology: idle + injure

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