Verboticism: Kleenexsport

'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Kleenexsport

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Biohazmat

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bīōhazmat

Sentence: Paul was so sick that he didn't even care that his attempt to contain his tissues had gone hopelessly astray. Between the sofa where he was curled up and the waste paper basket was a trail of used tissues — a mucous menace — a phlegm flow — a biohazmat. After 3 days the mass had started to congeal into a two-dimensional piñata from hell.

Etymology: Biohazard (a risk to human health or the environment arising from biological work) + hazmat (Hazardous materials and items) + mat (a small rug)

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COMMENTS:

Haz my vote... - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:03:00

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Phlegmageddon

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: flem-uh-GED-on

Sentence: So ill was Bob that he truly believed that he had died and been reincarnated as a nose. Despairingly he was a nose not of classic beauty such as a hepburn, but more in the mould of a durrante. And things didn't seem to be getting any better for him, for when the great Rhinobyl disaster struck, and not even a puff of air issued out of the quatrils of Nosetradamus, he started to believe the end was nigh. Fellow snoozles, konks, beaks and candlesticks gather around him, honkers heavenwards, looking for signuses, but the outlook remained grimaldi, things were, "C'est beaucoup." Indeed, he was sure, that a phlegmaggedon of tissumungous proportions was slowly enveloping him.

Etymology: PHlEGM: the thick mucus secreted in the respiratory passages and discharged through the mouth, esp. that occurring in the lungs and throat passages, as during a cold. 2. one of the four elemental bodily humors of medieval physiology, regarded as causing sluggishness or apathy. ARMAGEDDON: the last and completely destructive battle. Any great and crucial conflict.

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COMMENTS:

Great Sentence. Luv Jimmy Durante! Great way to start the new year ... with a great eponym! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:46:00

Sounds like Bob was quite phlegmatic. - Mustang, 2009-01-04: 06:09:00

Poor Bob, to be halluciphlegmatic and fighting the ultimate War of the Noses! - mweinmann, 2009-01-05: 16:33:00

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Tisspew

Created by: zabxuq

Pronunciation: tiss-sp_u

Sentence: The flu was simply too much. Fixing his own lunch was out of the question. With barely enough energy to tisspew, Gil could do nothing but wait for chicken soup reinforcements to arrive under their own power.

Etymology: Tisspew: v. combination of tissue: a thin gauzy paper + spew: eject or cast away.

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COMMENTS:

Souper! - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:06:00

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Tissidue

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TISH-i-dyoo

Sentence: You imprison me in the dark recesses of your bags and pockets until I'm ready to be used for your most basic needs. You wipe your filthy hands on me; you spit on me. You drown me in your fetid waste. You despise me, calling me a threat to your environment. You throw me away. But remember it was you who you made me what I am - tissidue - for there was a time when I was a tree.

Etymology: Blend of TISSUE & RESIDUE

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COMMENTS:

Tree mend us. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 10:46:00

how sad - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 16:58:00

Your sentence reminds me of "The Giving Tree" — albeit a more bitter version... - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:24:00

Poignant, yet elementree...where's my tissue? - Nosila, 2008-03-11: 22:36:00

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Snotaclysm

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: snot-a-kliz-uhm

Sentence: Hector's bout with the flu and the resulting tissue pile left his bedroom looking like a total snotaclysm.

Etymology: snot (mucus) + cataclysm (disaster)

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Topplesnot

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: top'/el/snot

Sentence: "Be careful," she warned her guest, "I've had a nasty cold all weekend and I haven't cleaned up the topplesnots yet. There's one on the couch and one beside the la-z-boy, so watch your step."

Etymology: topple (to fall or tumble forward as from having too heavy of a top) + snot (mucus from the nasal passages)

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Encompasnot

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: en-kuhm-puh-snot

Sentence: After he removed the encompasnot from the entire floor of his bedroom, he hesitated to dispose of it in the composter, perhaps it would contaminate the earth? Maybe grow into a big mucus tree of snot?

Etymology: encompass + snot

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Nosemasses

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: nose - mass - es

Sentence: Praying my cold will soon go away, my used tissues I lay ... in nosemasses at the side of my bed.

Etymology: NOSE: protruding part the face through which humans breathe. During a cold/flu, noses excrete mucous profusely usually disposed of in tissues that rise in nose-like peaks. MASSES: mounds, heaps, religious services.

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COMMENTS:

you should probably say the nosary as well - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:31:00

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Masturgration

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: MASS-TER-GRAY-SHUN

Sentence: Steve was so sick he couldn't believe the enormity of the masturgration that had occurred when he came to.

Etymology: Those dirty little tissues that seem pile up when you're feeling really sick.

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Tississue

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tiss_ISS-yew

Sentence: Feeling rotten all over from the bug he was fighting Barry realized he had a potentially dangerous tississue with the growing pile of infectious kleenex but he just felt too lousy to make the necessary effort to deal with it

Etymology: Blend of 'tissue' (sanitary wipe) and 'issue' (in a state of controversy)

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