Verboticism: Disguift

'Why are you putting that by the front door?'

DEFINITION: n., An ugly decorative item or article of clothing received from friends or relatives, which is kept stored away but ready to be pulled out at a moment's notice in anticipation of a return visit. v., To temporarily place an old, and perhaps unattractive gift in a place of honor.

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Ugiftorate

tonii

Created by: tonii

Pronunciation: /ug-ift-o-rate/

Sentence: If you don't ugiftorate that nasty green vase onto the coffee table, your sister-in-law will never speak to you again!

Etymology: ugly + gift+ decorate

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Disguift

Carla

Created by: Carla

Pronunciation: dis-gwift

Sentence: Mary smiled through gritted teeth as she opened the box containing Aunt Sally's latest knitted monstrosity. The crocheted trousers would be consigned to the disguift drawer immediately.

Etymology: disgust + gift

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Exhibilious

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: igzibilyəs

Sentence: Nobody is quite sure why Jon*s aunt thought it was an appropriate wedding gift or why she brought it back from Borneo in the first place. Some say she spent too much time in the sun. Others suspect a side-effect of a medication combination. Whatever the case, the godawful, gilded, stuffed monkey candelabra takes its exhibilious spot on the dining room table whenever she comes to visit. The good news is that there is not much need to prepare extravagant meals when the **flaming monkey god** is on display.

Etymology: exibit (publicly display a work of art or item of interest) + bilious (affected by or associated with nausea or vomiting)

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Hideopresent

Created by: jajsr

Pronunciation: Heh-dee-o-preh-zint

Sentence: Knowing that his in-laws were coming to visit for the holidays, Bill's wife made him wear the hideopresent of a sweater that her mom made him for Christmas last year.

Etymology: Combination of "Hideo" from hideous - offensive to the senses and especially to sight; and "Present" - to make a gift to.

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Ornamenstrocity

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ohr nam ens troh sitee

Sentence: it took three men and a JCB to mount the ornamenstrosity on the patio, but a gift from toni was a gift from toni, capese?

Etymology: ornament, monstrosity

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COMMENTS:

terrific word - Jabberwocky, 2008-12-16: 11:24:00

Great word - TJayzz, 2008-12-16: 13:15:00

Capese! You keep trying to put it away, but they keep pulling you back! - Nosila, 2008-12-16: 22:20:00

metrohumanx Fuggetaboutit! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:05:00

Ornamentatious! - dochanne, 2008-12-17: 03:19:00

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Beastowal

robohamster

Created by: robohamster

Pronunciation: Beast-owal

Sentence: My aunt beastowed this moose sweater on me last Christmas.

Etymology:

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Uglift

Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: uh-ga-lif-ta

Sentence: After the party she stashed away her newest uglifts.

Etymology: ugly + gift

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Drekorations

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: drekərāshən

Sentence: John and Mary loved their friend Holly. The problem is that Holly loves "outsider" art. Terms like found objects made John and Mary cringe. Several years ago Holly had given them a string of garland made of old soup cans, painted egg cartons, and even beads made from dried bear scat. Because Holly was such a regular visitor, there was no way they could get away with NOT putting up this drekoration. As they wrapped the garland around the banister John would quietly sing to himself, "Deck the halls with bowels from Holly".

Etymology: drek (rubbish; trash) + Decoration (the process or art of decorating or adorning something)

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COMMENTS:

That stinks! :-) - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-16: 04:45:00

Retroshabby.....the new chic. - Mustang, 2008-12-16: 20:59:00

Fabulous. - dochanne, 2008-12-16: 22:59:00

Fabulous. - dochanne, 2008-12-17: 01:34:00

Terrific - always wanted to use dreck in a verbotomy. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:09:00

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Faceholder

Created by: emdeejay

Pronunciation: Faye Solder

Sentence: Dear old Aunt Faye. She would be best described as having a heart of gold, being generous to a fault, and possessing a taste for the profoundly kitsch. The cupboards of her relatives were stacked to the brim with gifts ranging from the impossibly garish, to the patently absurd. This year, Jayne and John were taking their turn at hosting the family festive gathering. Some show of appreciation for Faye's presence would have to be shown, so after a short deliberation it was down with the Salvador Dali print, and up with "Big Mouth Billy Bass"! Fortunately the luncheon passed without major incident; the family chipper, overfed, and blissfully subdued. Suddenly, an uncomfortable silence fell over the mirthful murmur as Faye inquired: "John whatever became of that delightful water feature I gave you, or that fabulous paisley shirt?" Faceholder to the rescue! John strolled casually over to Billy Bass and just before pressing the button he remarked "Dear Aunt Faye! My shirt has been worn so often, it's at the tailors for a mend. But Billy you see is the pride of the mantle!" And the family, relieved, joined Billy in a rousing rendition of "Take me to the river"

Etymology: Placeholder: Object or entity employed until an adequate replacement can be found. Face (to save): action employed for the purpose of maintaining dignity.

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Gifthoarse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gift hors

Sentence: Christmas Season means family visits and redecorating to accommodate and proudly show off the bizarre previous gifts reveived from the visitors. When Wendy & Peter redecorated, they always included the present his Mother had given him and thought was a perfect addition to their lodge-like home, Billy-The-Singing-Big-Bass-Fish-Stuck-On-A-Wall-Plaque. She would repeatedly push the button and play "YMCA" over and over, laughing all the way. Luckily so many years of abuse had almost worn out his singing voice and Billy was now a gifthoarse.

Etymology: Gift (present) & Gifthorse (a gift (usually of inferior quality) that should be accepted uncritically) & Hoarse (deep and harsh sounding as if from shouting or illness or emotion)

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