Verboticism: Resumenial

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Resumenial

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Dummydown

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: dumb me down

Sentence: Once upon a time, (for this is how all fairy tales begin) the king exiled Mr. Loang Gone Silver, the bank pirate, to the I'lland country, where he thought his stashed salary millions, awaited him in an off-shore account. King Blackberry, however, had used his magic compupowers to hi-hack the money back! Due to his infamy, Mr. Loang Gone Silver had to change his name, and hide the terrible fact he was once a note-orious bank president, and go looking for a job. His dummydown resume' led him to his new job, as the dumbme, down at the gift shop on the beach, where he became the strawboss and sole-seller of straw shoes and straw hats. Mr. Loang Gone Silver was given the ailias Mr. Long Gone Bigshot.

Etymology: DUMMY, DOWN which is synonymous with DUMB ME DOWN. Dummy - 1) a fake. -2) an offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence or credulity ( informal insult ). Dumb - of lesser intelligence. Down - at a lower level.

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COMMENTS:

Sometimes he moonlighted as a partner to Mr. BoJangles! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 01:59:00

He said I dance now at every chance in honky tonks for drinks and tips But most the time I spend behind these county bars 'cause I drinks a bit He shook his head, and as he shook his head I heard someone ask him please Mr. Bojangles, Mr. Bojangles Mr. Bojangles, dance.. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:01:00

his new job sounds nicer than being a bank president - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:43:00

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Noncomplishments

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: non kom plish ments

Sentence: When Bank Manager Mr. Drysdale applied at the fast food restaurant for a part-time job, his resume was full of noncomplishments. His interest in the job was on account of the fact that he'd lost a lot in his bank retirement savings plan. The Assistant Manager who interviewed him after he deposited his application did not trust his resume. It was a wicket lie he knew, but he could hardly teller the truth. He had worked at a Sperm Bank...

Etymology: Non (negative, not at all) & Accomplishments (achievements, qualifications, abilities acquired by training)

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Brevsume

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: brev + som + ay

Sentence: Joyce had two versions of her resume ready so that she could qualify for both entry level and professional job openings. Her resume contained years of achievements, awards and education. Her brevsume was much shorter. It began with her illustrious career as a papergirl, progressed to bagging groceries and ended with her stint as a parking lot attendant...

Etymology: Brevity and Resume >> Brevity (The quality of being brief in duration; Succinctness; conciseness) Resume (summary of educational and employment experience)

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COMMENTS:

wonderful verbotomy - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:36:00

Very good! - Mustang, 2009-02-25: 21:18:00

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Dummary

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dum ma ree

Sentence: Jim's resume for the fast fry cook's position was actually a dummary of his career's achievements. After cooking the books at the bank for 30 years, he felt he could cook anything this place served.

Etymology: Dumb (not so smart) & Summary (a resume, brief job/education history;

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Gentrylevel

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: jentrēlevəl

Sentence: When Prince Gustuv found that the family fortune was not what it once was, it became clear that he would have to find a way to make some money. There are few jobs earmarked for the nobility so it looked he would have to downplay his rank and take a (gasp!) gentrylevel position. The interviewer tried hard to not burst out laughing when he saw "formerly know as Prince" on the resume.

Etymology: gentry (the class of people next below the nobility in position and birth) + level (a height or distance from the ground or another stated or understood base) play on entry-level

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COMMENTS:

superb - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:40:00

Very good, and it made me laugh! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-26: 20:11:00

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Warewithdrawal

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: WARE with DRAW eul

Sentence: After Bob was laid off from his job and he didn’t have the wherewithal to pay his bills, he decided he was too young to retire and needed to get a job. A long time salesman and way overqualified, he found that the wares he had to sell at this point in his life were his lack of credentials rather than his credentials. It became evident that if he worked at it he had the warewithdrawal he needed to undersell his abilities.

Etymology: WARE: an asset or product to sell WHEREWITHAL: means to make something happen NONE: WITHDRAWAL:

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COMMENTS:

terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:42:00

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Crapplication

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun

Sentence: He tried to gloss over the error on his crapplication, insisting that Doctor was his first name

Etymology: application, crap

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COMMENTS:

that would be a neat first name - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00

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Backgroundheck

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: back round heck

Sentence: When the supervisor eventually got around to verifying Sato’s resume denials, she’d probably cast it aside, giving him backgroundheck. How could a software specialist ever last fslipping burgers?

Etymology: From backgroundcheck (to verify references and qualifications) and "heck", a scold/verbal punishment.

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Denyigreat

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: dee/ny/I/grate

Sentence: In these tough economic times the only way I could get a job at the local McDonalds was to denyigreat, which was difficult because I am.

Etymology: deny + I + great + denigrate (disparage)

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Negatiation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: neg ayt she ay shun

Sentence: In Harris' negatiation attempt get a $10 per hour job at the local fast food place, he had not anticipated being interviewed by someone who knew his real past.

Etymology: Negate (to deny, omit) & Negotiation (bargaining, discussion to come to an agreement)

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