Verboticism: Resumenial
DEFINITION: v. To deny one's accomplishments, or minimize one's abilities in order to obtain a job. n. A resume, or list of qualifications, which has been disembellished and disemboweled to meet extremely low job requirements.
Voted For: Resumenial
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Splinterviewing
Created by: matte76
Pronunciation:
Sentence: Bob was splinterviewing for the fry cook job since there was nothing else available. The 60-year olds' resume had obviously been splinterviewed to increase its' appeal.
Etymology:
Crapplication
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun
Sentence: He tried to gloss over the error on his crapplication, insisting that Doctor was his first name
Etymology: application, crap
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COMMENTS:
that would be a neat first name - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00
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Quashification
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Kw-osh-i-fi-kay-shun
Sentence: Having been made redundant from his job at the city stockmarket, Henry had tried for so many jobs that he had lost count. He decided to try quashification and when asked about his previous employment he would tell any future employer that he was nothing more than the tea boy.
Etymology: Quash(prevent from being expressed or becoming public knowledge) + Qualification(a pass of an exam or completion of a course in order to meet the requirements of a certain job) = Quashification
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COMMENTS:
nice blend - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Brevsume
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: brev + som + ay
Sentence: Joyce had two versions of her resume ready so that she could qualify for both entry level and professional job openings. Her resume contained years of achievements, awards and education. Her brevsume was much shorter. It began with her illustrious career as a papergirl, progressed to bagging groceries and ended with her stint as a parking lot attendant...
Etymology: Brevity and Resume >> Brevity (The quality of being brief in duration; Succinctness; conciseness) Resume (summary of educational and employment experience)
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COMMENTS:
wonderful verbotomy - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:36:00
Very good! - Mustang, 2009-02-25: 21:18:00
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Accomplishmin
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: ə-kŏm'plĭsh'mĭn
Sentence: She knew they would take one look at her resume and be worried about the safety of their own jobs. What she needed was an accomplishmin, minimizing her extensive over qualifications, just so should could get in the door.
Etymology: accomplishment - a special skill or ability acquired by training or practice, min - short for minimize, to reduce
Caredaction
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Cer-re-dak-shun
Sentence: John really needed this menial job, so performed a little caredaction on his resume before submitting it.
Etymology: from Career (An occupation undertaken for a significant period of a person's life and with opportunities for progress.) and redact(Edit (text) for publication.)
Selfeffacting
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: cellf-eh-fak-ting
Sentence: Downey Outman was so selfeffacting on his resume the Human Resources Manager, Noah Job, could hardly bear (or is it bare?) to read the words printed by hand on the soft double-ply tissues.
Etymology: A play on SELFEFFACING, humble or modest using FACT, knowledge or information based on real occurances
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COMMENTS:
very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Mcjobimize
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: Mc/Job/i/mize
Sentence: To be even considered for the position at Dollarama, Joe had to McJobimize his resume leaving everything out that he did since high school.
Etymology: McJobimize - verb - from McJob (a none descript low paying job such as a burger server, or store greeter) + minimize (to represent at the lowest possible amount)
Curriculumbidet
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day
Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."
Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)
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COMMENTS:
You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00
Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00
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Backgroundheck
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: back round heck
Sentence: When the supervisor eventually got around to verifying Sato’s resume denials, she’d probably cast it aside, giving him backgroundheck. How could a software specialist ever last fslipping burgers?
Etymology: From backgroundcheck (to verify references and qualifications) and "heck", a scold/verbal punishment.