Verboticism: Motortoise

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Motortoise

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Slowffeur

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slo fewer

Sentence: Archie drove his ancient Triumph convertible every day down the freeway to his appointments and errands. He was a slowffeur and believed his car lasted longer if he drove slower. Luckily he was very hard of hearing, so he missed all the honks he got from his fellow commuters in the fast lane. He believed that a safe speed was one that was exactly one half of the posted limit. He was finally pulled over one morning by the Highway Patrol. The officer naturally requested to see his license and insurance papers, to which Archie finally shouted: "Never needed either, since I never go over the limits. I don't need papers, I know how to drive!"

Etymology: Slow (not moving quickly; taking a comparatively long time) & Chauffeur (someone paid to drive a person in a car;to drive someone in a vehicle;a person who drives vehicles for a living)

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COMMENTS:

I think I rode in his taxi once. - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:42:00

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Petroloiter

Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: pe-tro-loi-ter

Sentence: People tend to petroloiter on Sundays. This causes weekend commuters no end of frustration!

Etymology: petrol + loiter

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Zimmerlane

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: zim-err-layn

Sentence: i enjoyed heading out on the weekend for some zimmerlaning

Etymology: zimmer frame, lane

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Lackcelerate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lak sel er ayt

Sentence: When Sydney drove his old sports car out and about, he drove very slowly even in the fast lane, behind a big cow. His failure to lackcelerate caused many passersby to give him the finger and hurl abuse at him. Sydney did not care...he was nearly deaf, wore thick glasses due to his myopia and put-putted his way along. One day the local constabulary pulled him over for obstructing the flow of traffic. The officer was confused why Sydney was always following a cow. Sydney pointed out that the cow was towing him because it saved him a fortune on gas!

Etymology: Lack (to be without) & Accelerate (to move faster)

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COMMENTS:

must have been fresian with the top down :) - galwaywegian, 2010-06-11: 03:40:00

But he lived happily heifer after... - Nosila, 2010-06-11: 11:53:00

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Lanedarme

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: lān därm'

Sentence: The left-lane bandits were more than Herb could take that day. He was trying to get to his daughter's recital, but they insisted on self-righteouslycreeping along at the posted limit in the far left lane. Then, to Herb's immense satisfaction, and for the first time in recorded history, the Highway Patrol came to the rescue, pulled the lanedarme over and wrote him a citation for obstructing traffic.

Etymology: lane + gendarme

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Recardation

Created by: toadstool57

Pronunciation: rE-car-dA-shun

Sentence: The car pool is late for the work. The driver tries to make it on time as he comes across a motorist suffering from a case of recardation, in the fast lane, and relizes they are doomed.

Etymology: retard, as in slow/car

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Egomotortist

Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: ee-goh-moh-tawr-tist

Sentence: It was ten minutes to close at the only store in town when my baby's mama held up the last diaper in the house and announced that junior had suddenly developed an explosive case of diarrhea. I would have made it there and back with time to spare if not for an egomotortist in a Prius. When I returned without reinforcements, things went south down south. For the rest of the night I wished that junior could have spent just one minute in that guy's car.

Etymology: egotist + motorist + tortoise (in sound mostly)

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Sloweerty

Created by: balku4

Pronunciation: slow-eer-tee

Sentence: that fat sowerty

Etymology: slow

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Carstipate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: kahr-stuh-PEYT

Sentence: Whilst driving Bob slow, dribble-to -rule approach left a long line of carstipated drivers behind him.

Etymology: Blend of CAR & CONSTIPATE: prevent passage through; impede; crowd together

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COMMENTS:

I can just hear a traffic reporter saying "The highway is carstipated" instead of "congested". Love it! - Jamagra, 2008-04-07: 14:05:00

hate those traffic fumes - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-07: 16:46:00

Love it! Yep, a great word to describe a traffic jam. - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:10:00

It's a natural! - arrrteest, 2008-04-07: 20:58:00

Bob, it makes me think you fuel up with prune juice! Great word...very binding! - Nosila, 2008-04-08: 01:49:00

love it! - Softbagel14, 2008-04-08: 23:38:00

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Freewaste

Created by: queenjane75

Pronunciation: free-waste

Sentence: It was only a fraction of a moment Shawn had spent attempting to read the grocery list his girlfriend had sent by text message. Shawn had become the latest multitaskhole killed by a freewaster slacking in the fast lane.

Etymology: freeway+waste (as in waste one's time)

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