Verboticism: Moronicretailist

Already Voted

Vote not counted. We have already counted two anonymous votes from your network. If you haven't voted yet, you can login and then we will count your vote.


Moronicretailist

You still have one vote left...

Customyeranidiot

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kəstəmyoŏranidēət

Sentence: Spring has come to the Mall. There is a sense of renewal as the new product lines are displayed. Gone are the Winter doldrums of the Christmas left-over sales and inventory sales. Maybe, just maybe the next customer who comes through the door will be engaging, funny, insightful, interesting... but alas each entrant into the customer-of-the-year competition seems to find a way to transmogrify from patron to customyeranidiot with insipid questions like, "Do you work here?" "Are these (the display with the strobing 50% off sign) the sale items?" or "This item that I just dropped on the floor has a chip. Can I get a mark-down on it?" The clerk soon retreats to thoughts of after-work diversions and mentally seeks a "happy place" instead of the "uzi on the rooftop" place. Retail is swell!

Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + "You're an idiot" (self- explanatory)

Vote For | Comments and Points

Excusemebutt

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: ex-kuse-mee-but

Sentence: Karla was still stinging about losing her job at the securities firm when she started her shift at the discount store. Not only did she have to give up her salary and benefits, but instead of having a latte with the girls in mailing she was stuck with spending her days trying to communicate with the idiot teenagers who worked there. On top of everything else she was ready to take a swing at the next excusemebutt that came up to her to see if she was an employee when she was obviously wearing a disgusting brown shirt with a moronic pink and orange logo on it. They would look directly at her name tag and say, "Excuse me, but, do you work here?" She wanted to scream,"Do you really think someone would intentionally go out of the house in this shirt?"

Etymology: Excuse: pardon, forgive; Butt: (slang) buttocks

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Very funny! - splendiction, 2009-03-28: 11:12:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Staffinvection

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: staff in vek shun

Sentence: When George the patient asked the man in the hospital with the white scrubs; the stethoscope, mask and chart whether he worked there as he took George's vitals, he got himself a case of staffinvection.

Etymology: Staff (employee) & Invection (. An expression which inveighs or rails against a person) & Wordplay on Staph Infection (A spherical gram-positive parasitic bacterium of the genus Staphylococcus, usually occurring in grapelike clusters and causing boils, septicemia, and other infections).

Vote For | Comments and Points

Assking

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: ass king

Sentence: On his shoulder, the huge brassy button said in big letters: assistant manager. Therefore, everyone was asstounded and asstonished to hear Stu Pid, assking, "Do you work here?"

Etymology: ASS, KING, ASKING. Asking redumbdant (redundant) questions makes one an assking. ASS - offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence. KING - the greatest and most powerful leader of a people who are united by a common tie, in this case, by their level of intelligence. ASKING - to question.

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Very funny! And very good! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:18:00

Well there's an Ass----,Klutz---- and a Moron---- for today...we're all in the same mood :) Good one there! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:36:00

terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:24:00

I know Stu....worked with him....tried to avoid him...couldnt. - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:32:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Inquisidolt

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: in-QUIS-i-dolt

Sentence: Just got this one in "under the wire"...(electrified cattle fence)...I don't really know if this is "appropriate", but i TRUST all you crazy Verbotomists not to judge me too harshly... PAMBO wore his best "hoodie" while out shopping, and when he spotted the slinky young lady sporting a semi-commercial looking outer garb reminiscent of his favorite Progressive Insurance Representative (Stephanie Courtney), PAMBO cast all caution to the wind and asked her if she could get him a discount. PAMBO was rejected like a transplanted baboon heart, but it didn't cramp his style, because he was a dyed-in-the-wool INQUISIDOLT!

Etymology: One who makes obviously redundant inquiries....INQUISITION: a severe questioning;Middle English inquisicioun, from Anglo-French inquisition, from Latin inquisition-, inquisitio, from inquirere .....DOLT: a stupid person; probably akin to Old English dol foolish 1553....

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Where can i get a fish license? - metrohumanx, 2009-03-28: 00:19:00

Excellent....Pambo was master of the duhblivious... - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:29:00

Maybe you can get a fish license at the office of the justice of the deeps. - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:17:00

Great job of using James' cartoon for the basis for your sentence. Pambo is lucky he's not facing a sentence for his inquisidolt! You put a fresh spin on an old thing and got a big grin! As the old man in the old tv show Laugh In used to say "very interrrresting!" - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:29:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Duhblivious

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss

Sentence: Vernon was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.

Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)

Vote For | Comments and Points

Querylyevident

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: kweer/lee/ev/i/dent

Sentence: Even though Sam stood at the crosswalk in his bright orange vest with the yellow reflective stripe which said Crossing Guard, holding a giant stop sign, pedestrians would still pose the querlyevident question "Are you the Crossing Guard"? Sometimes it made him feel like running amok in traffic.

Etymology: query + evident + 'clearly evident'

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

LOL! made him feel like running amok in traffic. GOOD ONE! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:49:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-28: 00:00:00

play on the oft said 'fairly evident', too. Excellent word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:00:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Stupormarketing

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: stoo + por + mark + keting

Sentence: As a retail clerk, Jonah could vouch for all of the stupormarketing that is occurring in his town. It is difficult for him to reign in the sarcasm when asked if he works in the store while he mops up a spill or stocks the shelves from a pile of boxes.

Etymology: Stupor (the lack of critical cognitive function) Supermarket( A large self-service retail market that sells food and household goods) marketing (shopping at a market)

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

heh - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00

stupendous! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:42:00

----------------------------

Vote For | Comments and Points

Klutztomer

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: klutz tum urrrr

Sentence: trying to keep this particular klutztomer satisfied was like trying to herd cats

Etymology: customer klutz

Vote For | Comments and Points

Cusdumber

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kuhs-duh-mer

Sentence: If there is anything that a store clerk hates, it has to be the cusdumber who can't seem to do anything without asking a stupid question or making an ignorant statement. "Do you work here?" "This item is scratched (they just scratched it). Can I get a discount?" The only hope is if they get just a little dumber, they might forget to breath or how to get to to the store.

Etymology: customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another) + dumb (lacking intelligence or good judgment; stupid; dull-witted)

Vote For | Comments and Points

Show All or More...