Verboticism: Pestaclaus

'Why are you vacuuming the Christmas tree?'

DEFINITION: n., 1. A pine needle infestation, common during and after the holiday season. 2. Prickly Christmas guests who will not leave and cannot be cleaned up. v., To fall down during a holiday party and hide under a rug.

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Carpetjaggers

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: car-pet-jag-gers

Sentence: Carpetjaggers are resistant to vacuums, and may still be found in your carpet for several months after the tree has been removed, so caution is advised when running in bare feet; however, after several months, they break down and become part of the room's floora.

Etymology: wordplay on carpetbaggers: someone who moves into an area to take it over -- carpet: floor covering + jaggers: sharp or pointy projections

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Firensics

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fir en siks

Sentence: It was time to call in Lt. Horatio "Eye Candy" Cane. You know...he of the red hair, straight face and cool sunglasses. His team would soon figure out where the infestation of green needles was coming from. Christmas was 6 months ago, so where was the source? Pulling off his cool shades and standing with hands on hip, the lieutenant said that the trail of firensics evidence lead to a bag in the garage, covered in dead boughs and green plastic. The ghost of Christmas Tree past.

Etymology: Fir (coniferous tree, often used a Christmas tree) & Forensics (relating to the use of scientific methods to solve crimes and to find out who committed them...the evidence the gathers to prove criminal activity)

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Barbedlier

Carla

Created by: Carla

Pronunciation: barbd-lie-uh

Sentence: 'Beware the barbedlier on the sofa', Marge whispered to her husband as she passed him in the doorway. 'Your friend Tom had to stay for a week the last time he was this sozzled'.

Etymology: barbed wire + lier (one who lies down)

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Holidossus

Created by: Johnhicks

Pronunciation: Hol-y-Dos-sus

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Needlebain

Created by: roger153

Pronunciation: needle / bain

Sentence: Every year we have to put up with this same needlebain all over the house.

Etymology: pine needle mess

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Coniferocious

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Pilemonkey

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: pahyl-muhng-kee

Sentence: Ouch! I stepped on another pilemonkey. I thought we got all of those pine needles out of the carpet. ... Dan became a pilemonkey after he got drunk at our New Years party, and slept it off wrapped in the carpet from our foyer.

Etymology: pile: as in carpte pile + Monkey: a person likened to such an animal, as a mischievous, agile child or a mimic. OR Monkey: a burdensome problem, situation, hindrance.

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COMMENTS:

tonii will you need a pilemonkotomy to get the needle out? - tonii, 2007-12-17: 22:56:00

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Needlenettle

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: nee-dl-net-tl

Sentence: Marla and Jack used the DirtDevil to once again pick up the needlenettle under the tree. Despite using the latest in needle-retention technology, the tree insisted on dropping them. Jack finally had to agree it was time to dispose of the old artificial tree.

Etymology: needle (to annoy or pick on) + nettle (to aggravate or haunt)

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Scrourge

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: scru/urj

Sentence: Bah humbug! Stepping on pine needles from Christmas past, present and future is the scrourge of Christmas.

Etymology: scrourge + scrooge

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Pernoydles

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: PURR-noy-dulls

Sentence: Barbara O'Reilly and Keith attempted to remove the PERNOYDLES which spread thru the house like invasive Zebra Mussels, crowding out the native dustballs. Each holiday season, the PERNOYDLES from down the street always stayed until the last dregs of mead were consumed, and the last tasteless limerick recited. During the evening, one guest got a severe attack of the PERNOYDLES and couldn't be located for hours. Last year, we had to drag them out of the sewers and send a few home by taxicab. PERNOYDLES - a must to avoid.

Etymology: PERsistent+anNOY+neeDLES=PERNOYDLES....PERSISTENT:existing for a long or longer than usual holiday time or continuously,retained beyond the usual jolly period,degraded only slowly by the environment;Latin persistent-, persistens, present participle of persistere.....ANNOY:to disturb or irritate especially by repeated pseudo-festive acts or remarks,Middle English anoien, from Anglo-French anuier, ennoier, from Late Latin inodiare to make loathsome, from Latin in + odium hatred .....NEEDLES: a needle-shaped leaf,a slender pointed object resembling a needle,to harass or mock cruelly, to intentionally irritate ;Middle English nedle, from Old English nǣdl; akin to Old High German nādala needle, nājan to sew, Latin nēre to spin, Greek nēn.

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COMMENTS:

Linguistically detailed and PERcise. A PERleasure to PERuse! - dochanne, 2008-12-18: 01:35:00

OH HO! Nice etymology. Pernod (liquor) and needles was what first came to mind. - silveryaspen, 2008-12-18: 02:48:00

metrohumanx Thank you. An absinthesis from the wee hours of the morning. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:32:00

metrohumanx If you want to REALLY laugh, check out the toys at goblertoys.com: - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:59:00

metrohumanx http://goblertoys.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 18:00:00

Crowding out the native dustballs, how pernicious! PERfect! - Nosila, 2008-12-18: 20:38:00

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