Voted For: Dormident

Created by: bdraffen0002

Pronunciation: /ˈskôfəl/

Sentence: I pulled my back when I got in a scoffle with my phone, I was trying to plug it in under the counter without it turning on.

Etymology: Scoff: late 18th century (as a verb): originally a variant of Scots and dialect scaff . The noun is from Afrikaans schoff, representing Dutch schoft ‘quarter of a day,’ (by extension) ‘meal.’ and Scuffle late 16th century (as a verb): probably of Scandinavian origin; compare with Swedish skuffa ‘to push’; related to shove and shuffle.

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/jur/sheea

Sentence: Mark suffered from chronic injurtia. He often injured himself surfing the internet or changing stations on the remote.

Etymology: injure + inertia

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: ôr'dn-ou'ē

Sentence: Kip couldn't believe the pain of the muscle strain in his lower back. He had been in fights and car wrecks, and had sufferred various wounds in them as well as during his stint as a military policeman in Saigon, but this was just an ordinowie-a channel-changing injury-he'd pulled his back reaching for the remote.

Etymology: 'Ord,' Army post in Monterey Bay, California; 'inow,' var. on the mantra of the know-it-all; 'ie,' abbr. for id est, latin, 'that is.'

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COMMENTS:

interesting ety, there! - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:12:00

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: mag neh dent

Sentence: Phil was a congenital magnadent. To say he was accident prone would be an understatement. Accidents seemed to find him in the most mundane and safe places. It was a good thing he had insurance, because otherwise he's be in quite a bind. His policy has several riders on it that prohibit him from climbing steps, riding bikes with any amount of wheels, crossing the street, eating while walking, and hundreds of other scenarios that indicate a troubled past.

Etymology: magnet + accident

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COMMENTS:

Phil probably could not walk past a fridge without sticking to it...Good One! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:49:00

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Created by: balku4

Pronunciation: pai-nohr-mee-ca-le-si-stic

Sentence: i got Painormicalasistic yesterday by jumping up and down.

Etymology: none

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: owch pot ay to

Sentence: Dudley Dolittle was admitted to the ER with life-threatening (in his mind)injuries. He was innocently lying on the couch, watching Law & Order Special Victims Unit at 3:00 pm, just before The Office came on in double episode at 4:00 pm. When all of a sudden the remote fell on the floor. He reached over to grab it and fell off the couch, hitting his head and temporarily knocking himself out. When he regained conciousness, he got up off the floor to go look in the mirror at any possible bruises. Unfortunately, the cat had knocked over a vase filled with flowers and water and he slipped on the hardwood floor. When the ambulance came, Dudley was in major pain. Turns out he'd wrenched his back, broke his ankle and wrist. He'd turned from a Couchpotato into an Ouchpotato. Later, when asked what caused his injury, he was able to truthfully tell people that while on an undercover assignment, he was attacked when a wild cat hit him in his sweet peas, on his way to The Office. Sadly, he was believed...

Etymology: Ouch (hurt;wound;exclamation used to express pain) & Couch Potato (an idler who spends much time on a couch (usually watching television)

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: in - jur - eees

Sentence: Judy had a new injurease. She sprained her arm when she reached into the refrigerator to get the orange juice. It seemed that it hurt just to be alive.

Etymology: injury, ease

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COMMENTS:

Makes you want to avoid orange juice. Evil orange juice. - artr, 2009-06-01: 05:22:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: u til layt

Sentence: In his Victim's Statement, Mervin could only lay blame on himself for the disfiguring stapler incident. He did indeed unwittingly youtilate himself by pointing the offending sharp electric stapler towards his groin area before firing at will. Sure he couldn't have kids now, but at least he was able to keep his legs together. His fastenating career at Staples was now secure!

Etymology: You (as in yourself, no one else;second person singular) & Mutilate (destroy or injure severely;alter so as to make unrecognizable)

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COMMENTS:

Clever! - Mustang, 2009-06-02: 00:00:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: sha-GRIN-jry

Sentence: Elwood suffered yet another chagrinjury when he got his finger caught in the whisk attachment on his mixer, jerked the mixer off the counter wherein it fell on his toes, and while dancing about in pain knocked himself senseless when his head whacked into the open cupboard door.

Etymology: Blend of 'chagrin' (a feeling of vexation, marked by disappointment or humiliation) and 'injury'

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COMMENTS:

What a klutz! Good one. - Nosila, 2009-06-01: 14:37:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: harm ill ee ate

Sentence: Stanley felt like he was born with a large "L" for Loser on his forehead. No one could harmiliate themself the way he could. He had lost every job he had ever worked at and injured himself over and over in the process. Like the time he got 3rd degree burns working at a fast food place, bobbing for French fries. Or the time he crashed his taxi cab by backing up at great speed into the police car that had pulled him over for speeding. The impact had caused him to crack his nose open on his own steering wheel and get 2 black eyes. Or the time he was sitting on the glass of the office photocopier to copy his bare bum, when the glass shattered and splintered into his flesh. Or the time he had worked at the bowling alley and got his fingers stuck in the holes of the ball that he was demonstrating for some kids. He went flying down the alley and into the pinsetter machine. He now knew where the terms "spare tire","gutter mouth", "pins & needles" and "split lip" came from. Yes, Stanley spent so much time at the local emergency room, that the staff had bought him his own coffee mug, just so they could take turns cracking up over his incident reports. But all that was about to change. Stanley had been hired to do his dream job. No more harmiliation for him...it would be someone else's turn. Yes, Stanley had been hired as a consultant for the Workers Compensation Board!

Etymology: harm (any physical damage to the body caused by violence or accident or fracture etc. or the act of damaging something or someone) & humiliate (cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of or embarrass)

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COMMENTS:

Yes, but will Stanley now get a paper cut on his eye, stab himself with stapler, or even smash his finger on the copy machine lid? - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:17:00

Most likely given his track record...I forgot about the time he worked at the butchers and accidentally backed up into the meat grinder, which made him get a little behind in his work...Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:41:00

Good one! - Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:15:00

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