Verboticism: Mortifimpaired
DEFINITION: v. To injure yourself while performing a normal everyday activity, such bending down, standing up, or turning your head quickly. n. An self-inflicted injury which occurred during a period of physical inactivity.
Voted For: Mortifimpaired
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Hackcident
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: hak sid dent
Sentence: Although in full body cast after his mishap, Steve was lucky to be alive. He had accessed secret Defense Dept. records and his hackcident was as a result of a professional visit by some burly, zealous Marine MP's. Semper Fi!
Etymology: Hack (To gain access to (a computer file or network) illegally or without authorization) & Accident (a mishap; especially one causing injury or death)
Ziplash
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: zip lash
Sentence: When Henry accidentally caught himself in the fly of his pants(ouch), he jerked his head down so quickly to see what he had done, that he gave himself ziplash.
Etymology: Zip (zipper, fly, fastener of clothing) & Whiplash (an injury to the neck as a result of rapid acceleration or deceleration)
Ouchpotato
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: owch pot ay to
Sentence: Dudley Dolittle was admitted to the ER with life-threatening (in his mind)injuries. He was innocently lying on the couch, watching Law & Order Special Victims Unit at 3:00 pm, just before The Office came on in double episode at 4:00 pm. When all of a sudden the remote fell on the floor. He reached over to grab it and fell off the couch, hitting his head and temporarily knocking himself out. When he regained conciousness, he got up off the floor to go look in the mirror at any possible bruises. Unfortunately, the cat had knocked over a vase filled with flowers and water and he slipped on the hardwood floor. When the ambulance came, Dudley was in major pain. Turns out he'd wrenched his back, broke his ankle and wrist. He'd turned from a Couchpotato into an Ouchpotato. Later, when asked what caused his injury, he was able to truthfully tell people that while on an undercover assignment, he was attacked when a wild cat hit him in his sweet peas, on his way to The Office. Sadly, he was believed...
Etymology: Ouch (hurt;wound;exclamation used to express pain) & Couch Potato (an idler who spends much time on a couch (usually watching television)
Sedenjury
Created by: queenjane75
Pronunciation: said-en-jury
Sentence: It was a rather confusing case for the public, but in the end both suicide and murder were ruled out as the cause of the bloody scene. According to the autopsy report, it was a rare, mortal sedenjury caused by an all-too-full exploding can of beer that did Bob in. Who knew couch-surfing could be so dangerous?
Etymology: Sedentary+Injury=sedenjury
Youtilate
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: u til layt
Sentence: In his Victim's Statement, Mervin could only lay blame on himself for the disfiguring stapler incident. He did indeed unwittingly youtilate himself by pointing the offending sharp electric stapler towards his groin area before firing at will. Sure he couldn't have kids now, but at least he was able to keep his legs together. His fastenating career at Staples was now secure!
Etymology: You (as in yourself, no one else;second person singular) & Mutilate (destroy or injure severely;alter so as to make unrecognizable)
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - Mustang, 2009-06-02: 00:00:00
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Insultwinjury
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: inn sull twin jerr eee
Sentence: Her latest insultwinjury occurred due to her using tweezers while driving. it gave new meaning to "keeping an eye on the road"
Etymology: insult to injury.
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COMMENTS:
great twist - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-15: 10:51:00
It's like when you put mascara on while driving...or so I'm told...good one. - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:56:00
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Workouch
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: wərkouch
Sentence: Every time Wendell goes to the gym to get in shape he ends up participating in a workouch. Its not that he doesn’t believe in warming up or starting slow and building up. He just doesn’t get that far. Last week he sprained his wrist opening the lock on his locker.
Etymology: workout (a session of vigorous physical exercise or training) + ouch (used to express pain)
Ouchpotato
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: ouch-puh-tey-toh
Sentence: A sedentary lifestyle with a certain level of atrophy have left Roger an ouchpotato.
Etymology: ouch (interjection used to express pain) + couch potato (a lazy person whose recreation consists chiefly of watching television and videos)
Magnedent
Created by: pieceof314
Pronunciation: mag neh dent
Sentence: Phil was a congenital magnadent. To say he was accident prone would be an understatement. Accidents seemed to find him in the most mundane and safe places. It was a good thing he had insurance, because otherwise he's be in quite a bind. His policy has several riders on it that prohibit him from climbing steps, riding bikes with any amount of wheels, crossing the street, eating while walking, and hundreds of other scenarios that indicate a troubled past.
Etymology: magnet + accident
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COMMENTS:
Phil probably could not walk past a fridge without sticking to it...Good One! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:49:00
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Autobashful
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: orto-BASH-full
Sentence: "Have you been in a car accident?" she asked on seeing the family with plaster casts, limps and bruises. Autobashfully he replied, "no we were just having a cup of tea on the verandah when the kids called the dog and it came charging up, knocking me off my seat. I stood up pushing the table back and it fell through the decking and down went the rest of the family too".
Etymology: auto (self) + bash (hit hard) + bashful (embarrassed)