Verboticism: Giftquester

'Why are you putting that by the front door?'

DEFINITION: n., An ugly decorative item or article of clothing received from friends or relatives, which is kept stored away but ready to be pulled out at a moment's notice in anticipation of a return visit. v., To temporarily place an old, and perhaps unattractive gift in a place of honor.

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Giftquester

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: gift/kwes/ter

Sentence: We have a box in our closet in the family room where we giftquester all the awful presents our relatives have given us and can be retrived at a moments notice and be placed accordingly some where in sight when they arrive at the front door.

Etymology: GIFTQUESTER - verb - from GIFT (a present) + SEQUESTER (to remove, or withdraw into solitude, or retirement; seclude)

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Gifthoarse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gift hors

Sentence: It had become a tradition at Christmas as much as decorating the tree and putting up lights. It meant Mother was coming to stay for the holidays and although we loved her dearly and looked forward to seeing her, we had to dig out that painting she had given us many years ago and hang it over the fireplace. It stayed the rest of the yhear in the attic. That's because it was painted on black velvet, with glow-in-the-dark paints, framed inside a gaudy rococco gilt frame. Yes, being his #1 fan, Mother had bought us a portrait of Elvis. Wearing a white jumpsuit, sneering into the microphone in his hand and tilting his pelvis our way! You could push a button at the bottom of the frame and tinny music of him singing would belt out. Our friends who visited over the years hooted and hollered at the tacky image. Neighbours would make the pilgrimmage each year to see The King. He was a gifthoarse that made people laugh and sing along. We always said we would pull him out for Mother's visit, so as not to hurt her feelings, but one of these years old age would overtake her and we would no longer be obligated to carry on the charade. It was then that we realized that the song he sang from the portrait, "I'll have a Blue Christmas without you" would become very poignant to us.

Etymology: gift (a present, something given) & hoarse (deep and harsh sounding as if from shouting or illness or emotion) & old saying: "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" old proverb which means don't question how you acquired something or what it cost. The advice given is be grateful for your good fortune and don't look for more by examining it to assess its value.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Awwww. How moving. Nice work, Lady. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-16: 02:40:00

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Dissedplay

Created by: Niktionary

Pronunciation: disstplay

Sentence: "I hate this sweater! But my grandma gave it to me, and I'm having dinner with her. I have to dissedplay it. I hope we go someplace dark!"

Etymology: Slang term diss and display

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Nandoohickey

Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Nan-doo-hickey

Sentence: Dave looked high and low, knowing Sandra would have hidden the dastardly thing well, and eventually found it. Tucked behind the blankets on the bottom shelf in the linen cupboard, he found his grandmother's favourite teapot, the grotesque frills and golden seashells just too much to bear. But Nanna was coming for tea and would expect her most obvious rellymajigs to be on show. "Good grief!" said Sandra, "You can't expect me to use that awful nandoohickey! I should have dropped the damn thing last time."

Etymology: Nan or nanna - grandmother, or great-aunt, frequently known for giving strange or age-inappropriate gifts because you were five last time they saw you. Doohickey - gadget, thingamebob or whatchamacallit that some dolt gave you but you don't know what to do with.

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COMMENTS:

Good one - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:10:00

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Junkredux

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: juhnk-re-duks

Sentence: Nathan employed a sneaky program of junkredux wherein he would put trashy gifts on prominent display when the givers would visit, the ghastly dragon head lamp his mother had given him for Christmas being the most notable example.

Etymology: Blend of 'Junk'(n. something of poor quality : trash) and 'redux' (adj brought back —used postpositively)

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Embhellishment

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: emb/hell/ish/ment

Sentence: Sally prided herself on her home's sleek minimilist decor and cringed in horror every time she had to bedeck the bathroom in the fuzzy pink acrylic toilet embhellishments her best friend had given her.

Etymology: embellishment + hellish

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COMMENTS:

Nice - TJayzz, 2008-12-16: 13:14:00

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Disguift

Carla

Created by: Carla

Pronunciation: dis-gwift

Sentence: Mary smiled through gritted teeth as she opened the box containing Aunt Sally's latest knitted monstrosity. The crocheted trousers would be consigned to the disguift drawer immediately.

Etymology: disgust + gift

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Curiotrocity

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: kuri/oh/traw/city

Sentence: A curiotrocity is a curio that is so atrocious that it defies description. I have several.

Etymology: curio + atrocity

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Hideopresent

Created by: jajsr

Pronunciation: Heh-dee-o-preh-zint

Sentence: Knowing that his in-laws were coming to visit for the holidays, Bill's wife made him wear the hideopresent of a sweater that her mom made him for Christmas last year.

Etymology: Combination of "Hideo" from hideous - offensive to the senses and especially to sight; and "Present" - to make a gift to.

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Eyestore

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: i-store

Sentence: When Dave's Auntie Joan had given him the hideous orange and green vase for Christmas last year he smiled broadly and thanked her very much telling her it was beautiful. However as soon as she had left he wrapped up the eyestore and put it straight into the loft. Auntie Joan is due to visit again this year on christmas day, so the plan is to get in the loft on Christmas eve and put the offending object in pride of place on the mantlepiece in the hope that it fools her into thinking that it has been there all year.

Etymology: Play on Eyesore

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