Verboticism: Smutile

DEFINITION: v., To strain with all your might in a desperate effort to open a sealed container, such as a jar of pickles. n., A small jar which cannot be opened.

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Torquemate

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (tr. v.) tôrk'ē-māt

Sentence: Max torquemated the mason jar lid until his fingers bled and teeth cracked.

Etymology: From Torquemada (1420 – 1498, first Inquisitor General of Spain, as a homage to his torture techniques) + -ate (suffix = a stem on which a verb may be formed)

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Ajaroplexy

Created by: QuantumMechanic

Pronunciation: uh JAR uh Plex ee

Sentence: After trying to open the tiny jelly jar, his ajaroplexy left him red-faced and hungry.

Etymology: a- + jar (container) + -oplexy (from apoplexy, strain)

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Writhepudding

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: rice pudding with a speech impediment rythe-pudding

Sentence: Yet again, Andy resorted to writhepudding to extract his dessert from the tin without a can opener. But it was a fruitless exercise. His strength was already depleted from the contortellini to obtain his first course.

Etymology: rice pudding + writhe

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Wristsist

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rist sist

Sentence: Stanley could normally open anything but this pickle jar was determined to wristsist all his efforts. Try as he mite, he could not open it. What he did not realize was that he had met the leader of the Wristsistance in his fridge, Colonel Cornichon. The Colonel had dilliberately held his position and mobilized his highly trained commandos, The Gherkins, to hold off Stanley's attacks. When Stanley held their stronghold under hot water and tapped it with a knife, the Colonel knew the siege was almost over and mustard his courage and sent out an SOS (Sweet or Sour) signal: "Mayo-day, Mayo-day, we don't relish this a salt. Although we've worked hard for our bread and butter, pickles, it is time to use our brines and admit defeat, since wristsistance is futile and sing the old war songs. 'Goodbye, Piccallili, Farewell Leicester Square, it's a long, long way to sip a sherry, but my heart's right there'. Dill we meet again, in the Alimentary Canal, I salute you."

Etymology: Wrist (a joint between the distal end of the radius and the proximal row of carpal bones) & Resist (refuse to comply;withstand the force of something;elude, especially in a baffling way)

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COMMENTS:

Can't open the pickle jar? No big dill! Great paranomasiac story... - LoftyDreamer, 2008-09-29: 20:23:00

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Machogotcha

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: maw-choh-GOT-cha

Sentence: Having always considered himself to be very manly and virile, Hector's self confidence suffered a major case of machogotcha when he failed at all attempts to open the jar of pickles at the office picnic.

Etymology: Blend of 'macho' (an assertively virile, dominating, or domineering male) and 'gotcha' (the fact of having beeen caught or defeated)

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COMMENTS:

Rolls off the tongue nicely - artr, 2008-09-26: 07:35:00

I like it. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-09-26: 18:17:00

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Vlasikinetropate

Created by: Kyoti

Pronunciation: Vlas-uh-kin-uh-TROH-payt

Sentence: Scooter loved Granny Mabel's homemade preserves, but some of them had been canned so long ago that he often failed to vlasikinetropate well enough to get them open without resorting to hammers or screwdrivers.

Etymology: Vlasic: a brand of pickles that come in impenetrable vacuum-sealed jars + Kinetic: a visible expenditure of energy + Tropism: motion derived from stimulus, such as hunger + Pate: referring to the forehead area which reddens and sweats during this process.

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Brineteaser

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: bryne tee zer

Sentence: Mason did not relish the brineteaser that Marsha had just given him. That jar of gherkins would take Herculean effort to open. He ran it under hot water and banged the lid with a knife, all to no avail. That lid was dilliberately stuck on for good. He had tried to be a dillagent, but if he thought that lid was coming off anytime soon, he was dilluded. When he dillvered the still-shut jar back to Marsha, she opened it first try. "You mustard loosened it for me, Mason!"

Etymology: Brine (a strong solution of salt and water used for pickling) & Teaser (a particularly baffling problem that is said to have a correct solution...play on BrainTeaser (A mentally challenging problem or puzzle)

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COMMENTS:

great word - mrskellyscl, 2010-02-25: 05:03:00