Verboticism: Downpay
DEFINITION: v. To deny one's accomplishments, or minimize one's abilities in order to obtain a job. n. A resume, or list of qualifications, which has been disembellished and disemboweled to meet extremely low job requirements.
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Accomplishmin
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: ə-kŏm'plĭsh'mĭn
Sentence: She knew they would take one look at her resume and be worried about the safety of their own jobs. What she needed was an accomplishmin, minimizing her extensive over qualifications, just so should could get in the door.
Etymology: accomplishment - a special skill or ability acquired by training or practice, min - short for minimize, to reduce
Resumenial
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: rezəmēnēəl
Sentence: John had always been fascinated by those guys on the street corner flipping and spinning signs announcing the latest going-out-of-business sale. When his company announced bankruptcy he jumped at the chance to try out for such a job. To do so he had to have his secretary create a resumenial for him, leaving out such details as his MBA and doctorate in finance as well as his years as CEO. The only job experience he listed was part-time dance instructor, a job that helped him get through college some 30 years prior. Unfortunately he was beat out for the job by a former member of The Village People who had a few dance moves of his own.
Etymology: resume (a brief account of a person’s education, qualifications, and previous experience, typically sent with a job application) + menial (work) not requiring much skill and lacking prestige)
Quashification
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Kw-osh-i-fi-kay-shun
Sentence: Having been made redundant from his job at the city stockmarket, Henry had tried for so many jobs that he had lost count. He decided to try quashification and when asked about his previous employment he would tell any future employer that he was nothing more than the tea boy.
Etymology: Quash(prevent from being expressed or becoming public knowledge) + Qualification(a pass of an exam or completion of a course in order to meet the requirements of a certain job) = Quashification
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COMMENTS:
nice blend - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00
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Splinterviewing
Created by: matte76
Pronunciation:
Sentence: Bob was splinterviewing for the fry cook job since there was nothing else available. The 60-year olds' resume had obviously been splinterviewed to increase its' appeal.
Etymology:
Crapplication
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun
Sentence: He tried to gloss over the error on his crapplication, insisting that Doctor was his first name
Etymology: application, crap
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COMMENTS:
that would be a neat first name - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00
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Denyigreat
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: dee/ny/I/grate
Sentence: In these tough economic times the only way I could get a job at the local McDonalds was to denyigreat, which was difficult because I am.
Etymology: deny + I + great + denigrate (disparage)
Curriculumbidet
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day
Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."
Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)
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COMMENTS:
You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00
Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00
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Crapplication
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: krap lik ay shun
Sentence: His crapplication for the tobacco glossed over many of his achievements and qualifications, including one particularly high office which he held and where he had gleaned some experience which may have been of benefit when selling cigars,
Etymology: application crap
Disconjobulation
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: dis-con-job-yu-LAY-shun
Sentence: With no possible chance to find another job in his highly specialized field, Horace found it necessary to apply for jobs he once considered beneath himself and found a little disconjobulation was necessary in order to 'qualify' for such menial positions.
Etymology: A play on the word discombobulation, or discombobulate (To throw into a state of confusion)
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COMMENTS:
I love the 'con-job' in the middle! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:15:00
great - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:39:00
Love it! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-27: 07:50:00
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Caredaction
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Cer-re-dak-shun
Sentence: John really needed this menial job, so performed a little caredaction on his resume before submitting it.
Etymology: from Career (An occupation undertaken for a significant period of a person's life and with opportunities for progress.) and redact(Edit (text) for publication.)