Verboticism: Frizzalysis

'Her hair is not!'

DEFINITION: v. To assess an individual's current mental state, or identify hidden personality traits, through careful analysis of their hairstyle. n. A method of psychoanalysis based hairdos and don'ts.

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Knottipathetic

Created by: jrogan

Pronunciation: not-tee-pah-theh-tik

Sentence: Roger figured he'd use his knottipathetic skills to get ahead at work. (He learned all about it on the internet during knotworking breaks.) But when he misdiagnosed his boss's bed-head as a subliminal invitation to get kinky, he ended up losing more than his hair.

Etymology: knot + pathy

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Tresstimate

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: tress-te-mayt

Sentence: as she walked in the room it was clear that 90% of the people there had already started tresstimating her abilities

Etymology: tress, estimate

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Coiffid

ubgrud

Created by: ubgrud

Pronunciation: cwaff-id

Sentence: My gosh! James must be going through a hard time if his coiffid is any indication. I've never seen a cowlick quite like that one.

Etymology: coiffe - hairdo id - freud re. basic needs

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Ponytelltale

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: poh-nee-el-teyl

Sentence: Anne is usually quite meticulous with her appearance. She spends a fair amount of time in the morning getting her hair just right. It doesn't require tips from Sigmund Freud to pick out her bad-mood days. The ponytelltale sends co-workers scurrying in every direction but in her path. If all she has done is cram her locks into a scrunchie the world better look out.

Etymology: ponytail (an arrangement of the hair in a long lock drawn tightly against the back of the head and cinched so as to hang loosely) + telltale (a thing serving to reveal or disclose something)

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Menthairity

Created by: ChrisCarrk

Pronunciation: Ment-hair-it-ee

Sentence: Her menthairity was all wrong today.

Etymology: Mentality+hair

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Analyfrizz

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: ənaləfriz

Sentence: Harry’s girlfriend can be moody at times. He can easily judge her by the state of her hair. A quick analyfrizz of the time spent managing the locks could tell him how to deal with her. Last Thursday he spotted her stomping down the street with a stocking cap pulled down to her eyebrows. She hadn’t seen him yet so he turned on his heel, ran to his apartment, texted her that he wasn’t feeling well and hid out for the evening.

Etymology: Analysis (short for psychoanalysis - a system of psychological theory and therapy that aims to treat mental disorders) + frizz (hair in a mass of small, tight curls or tufts)

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Tressomancy

Created by: lauramy

Pronunciation: tre-suh-man-see

Sentence: I tried to look aloof but she was using the dark powers of tressomancy to divine my true feelings.

Etymology: From MANCY which means "divination by means of" and TRESS which means "hair".

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Groomreading

Created by: mdschermer

Pronunciation: GROOM-rea-ding

Sentence: After some careful groomreading, I have decided that you must be one confused individual and are not just having a bad hair day.

Etymology: to groom + to read

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Folifrazycology

Created by: Hjason

Pronunciation: folly-fraz-e-cology

Sentence: Using folifrazycolgy, we were able to determine that Ken was a lazy individual.

Etymology: folicle-frazzle-psycology

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Doodiligents

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: doo dili gents

Sentence: When Tress was having a bad hair day, everyone knew it. The men in her life learned to stay clear if her ends were split or if her mane problem was her coiffure. They were examples of doodiligents and they knew Tress would cut, tease and brush them off if they cropped her style. They knew the fall out would be permanent and the best treatment was to streak out of her way and not frost her off worse. By extension, the mane reason they liked her was that her locks were to dye for, shorn nuff. Just don't get her dander up...

Etymology: Due Diligence (Investigation and analysis a prudent entrepreneur, owner, executive, or lender does in making business decisions.) & Doo (hair-do)

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