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Verboticisms

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Conglomergreats

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: cun glom er grates

Sentence: Alan Rench was out camping. He liked to rough it in the mountains. His sawtoothed blade doubled as his comb. His screw driver stirred his beans in the tin bucket, simmering over the campfire, as it hung by the tire iron, held aloft by his jack. His plate was one of his hubcaps. His pocket knife did triple duty, for he used it as his spoon and fork, too. He sang the old saw "I eat my beans with honey. I done it all my life. It makes 'em taste quite funny, but it keeps 'em on my knife." He also used his pocket knife to scrape his hubcap plate clean. Alan's multi-duty use of all his tools made them his conglomergreats!

Etymology: CONGLOMERATE - mix of many things. GREAT - large in number. So tools that be used for a mix of many things in a large number of ways are conglomergreats.

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COMMENTS:

It's a bit of a tongue twister, but if you can eat your beans off your knife, your tongue won't trip over it! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 01:11:00

metrohumanx I'd LOVE to camp out with you! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 01:13:00

metrohumanx Did you know you can cook flounder on your engine's manifold? It's VERY eco-efficient ! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:18:00

I'd only cook a fish on the manifold for the halibut! And ps, silvery, they should be called BEEns! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:53:00

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Disasterisk

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: dizz-ASS-turr-ISK

Sentence: Hacko's imported car had broken down on the Antelope Freeway, and as his deceased vehicle shuddered with the passing of each tractor trailer, he rummaged through the "hell box" of assorted utensils which took the place of a proper tool kit. Hacko was mechanically compromised, but he decided to DISASTERISK an amateur repair. Fortunately, he was not alone in his peril. Hacko's girlfriend and co-pilot/navigator was there with words of encouragement and derision to hasten his efforts at improvised repair. She handed him the HAZMOFLANGE, the WOUNDEVICE, the TRYTOFORCEITON, the NONFUNCTOROD, the BASSAKWARTOOL, the GIZMAYHURTCHA, the MISGUIDEPRESSOR, the MAYDAMAGEALLDEBAR and the chrome-plated MUTENSIL. After severing a tendon and skinning his knuckles, Hacko discovered that a DISASTERISK * was the tool most unsuited to to this particular problem. After sever bursting lacerations, he improperly used the DISASTERISK to hammer the engine into a steaming heap, demonstrated his version of "The Pain Dance" and stumbled down a hill onto a secondary road where he hailed a tow truck and ended his motorized nightmare...................................... * Nobody really knew what the DISASTERISK was, but some say it was purchased when Hacko fell under the hypnotic spell of a late-night infomercial and several bottles of fine Australian wine.

Etymology: DISaster+ASTErisk+RISK=DISASTERISK.....DISASTER: a sudden calamitous event bringing great damage, loss, or destruction, a sudden or great misfortune or failure; Middle French & Old Italian; Middle French desastre, from Old Italian disastro, from dis- (from Latin) + astro star, from Latin astrum.....ASTERISK: the character * used in printing or writing as a reference to various arbitrary meanings; Middle English, astarisc, from Late Latin asteriscus, from Greek asteriskos, literally, little star, diminutive of aster-, astēr.....RISK: someone or something that creates or suggests a hazard, possibility of loss or injury or peril; French risque, from Italian risco (1661).

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Always carry road flares, a roll of duct tape and a cool talisman when motoring. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 01:54:00

metrohumanx http://www.odd-tools.com/ - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 03:01:00

metrohumanx As the sun describes it's mighty arc over this hapless continent, I await eagerly the many creative wordisms about to appear... - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 03:16:00

I love 'MUTENSIL'. - Tigger, 2009-03-09: 11:03:00

Disasterisk...great word! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:56:00

Excellent! - Mustang, 2009-03-10: 02:54:00

Wonderful :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:04:00

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Tual

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: TYOO eul

Sentence: Many months after her boyfriend had run out on her, Sally realized that she had to clean out the basement of Dick’s tools. As she piled them by the garbage she suddenly started to see another picture. These tools might have other uses. It began with duct tape. She discovered that everything in her kitchen could be fixed, held together, or constructed with the help of duct tape. Soon she was cutting garlic with a utility knife; marinating meat in a paint tray; using crescent wrenches or hammers to tenderize meat; and a drill with a twirly contraption on the end as a mixer. All of these tools had dual functions. This huge tual box had proven its worthiness and found a place in her new kitchen-workshop.

Etymology: TOOL: DUAL:

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COMMENTS:

Sounds like the perfect word for Alton Brown (from the show 'Good Eats' - not sure if you've seen it, but he's always using items from the hardware store in the kitchen). - Tigger, 2009-03-09: 11:09:00

Smile-icious! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 11:13:00

super - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-09: 13:54:00

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Mixmasterplumber

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: mix/mas/tur/plum/ur

Sentence: "Honey - this mixmasterplumber is working like a dream with the plug in the toilet and I'll be done in time for you to finish making the birthday cake."

Etymology: Mixmaster + master plumber

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COMMENTS:

Yikes! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-09: 18:34:00

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Pimplement

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pimp lem ent

Sentence: Doris had the insane idea that if she cut down the size of her husband`s sander, it would be great for her erupting skin. It could make the surface smooth, slough off dead cells and stimulate the pores to prevent and eliminate acne. She called it her pimplement and after the first disastrous procedure, the paramedics advised her that her foolishness caused them to laugh their faces off, too.

Etymology: Pimple (acne, a zit) & Implement (equipment or tool used for a purpose)

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Toastercoaster

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: toe/ster/coe/ster

Sentence: The toastercoaster is a wonderful invention for making toast and keeping your hot chocolate warm.

Etymology: toaster + coaster

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Machamorphosis

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Mak-a-mor-foe-sis

Sentence: Budding inventor Ivor Patent-Pending, cleverly adapted his ceiling fan every winter by machamorphosis so that it blew out hot air, thus being able to dry his clothes when the weather was bad.

Etymology: Blend of Machine(an apparatus using mechanical power) and Metamorphosis(alter, to change completely)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT-O TJ!...and with a string attached, it makes an EXCELLENT cat toy! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:20:00

metrohumanx Machamorphosis....like a luvely flutterby! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:25:00

good one - galwaywegian, 2009-03-09: 14:27:00

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Macgyvervise

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: mak-gai-ver-vais

Sentence: When Dean returned to the parking lot only to find that some vandal had ripped the spark plug wire off his motorcycle, he pulled out his handy little wire-bound notebook, unwound the wire, and used that to MacGyvervise the spark plug wire, and was quickly on his way home.

Etymology: MacGyver - fictional television character known for his inventive use of common items, and practical science, to solve problems. + Improvise - to make or provide from available materials.

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COMMENTS:

If you read my sentence, that really happened to me. - Tigger, 2009-03-09: 01:57:00

metrohumanx I believe, Tigger. I once plugged a vacuum hose on my Toota Corolla with a golf pencil and escaped from very unsavory suburb just in the nick of time. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:04:00

metrohumanx And iu repaird my muffler at a rest stop with an empty tomato paste can, aluminum foil, and the ever-useful coat hanger! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:22:00

metrohumanx Mye pennmonchip seams toobe deteriorating az da nite wears on....zorry! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:24:00

Truth is always stranger than fiction. Great Create! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 11:07:00

what do you mean fictional? - galwaywegian, 2009-03-09: 12:00:00

he pulled out his handy little wire-bound notebook, unwound the wire, Very inventive and good word there & fast thinking on your part to repair your motorcycle!> (and used that to MacGyvervise the spark plug wire, and was quickly on his way home.) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-14: 19:01:00

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Gadgetlag

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gad jet lag

Sentence: Ever since Wilbur & Orville had sent air travel to the next plane, A.Fred O'Travel worked night and day to find something to help passengers get over the fear of flying. More specifically, he found passengers were not as much afraid of flying and as afraid of getting the dreaded jet lag, which could immobilize them upon disembarkment. So Fred made a device which helped passengers to calm down and not shout out as embarrassing statements as "They are going in the wrong direction" and turn them into positive statements, like, "We don't care where the pilots land, as long as it is on Earth!" Not only did this tool (which was placed in each passenger's drink, act as an anti-gadgetlag, it made the passengers remember a happy, ethereal experience, which made them want to book again and again with NirvanAir.

Etymology: gadget (a device that is very useful for a particular job) & Jet Lag(fatigue and sleep disturbance resulting from disruption of the body's normal circadian rhythm as a result of jet travel)

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COMMENTS:

Egad! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-10: 14:57:00

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Dimprovise

Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: Dimm-pro-vize

Sentence:

Etymology: Dim + Improvise

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COMMENTS:

like it ! - galwaywegian, 2010-09-21: 03:22:00

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Mcgyvered

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: mig eye verd

Sentence: the newly mcgyvered blender also delivered perfect soups smoothies and ballistic missiles

Etymology: mcgyver

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COMMENTS:

Mcgood word - Nosila, 2010-09-20: 08:50:00

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Skimprovise

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: SKIM-pro-vyz

Sentence: Even at risk of life and limb in using tools and devices dangerously to save a few pennies, Marlene would often skimprovise, sometimes even endangering those around her.

Etymology: Blend of 'skimp' (To provide for or supply inadequately; be stingy with) and 'improvise' (to make, provide, or arrange from whatever materials are readily available)

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COMMENTS:

You captured exactly why we do this! Your word for this definition is perfect! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 11:09:00

Good word. - kateinkorea, 2009-03-09: 18:39:00

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Adapdeadly

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ad ap ded lee

Sentence: Her array of adapdeadly tools included the cheesecuttercontraceptivewire, which took all risk of pregnancy and enjoyment out of the proceedings

Etymology: adapted, deadly

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Pimplement

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pimp le ment

Sentence: Janice had finally hit on the next great thing. She modified her belt sander to plane off the zits and blackheads on her T-Zone. She called it a pimplement. It seemed like a great idea at the time, but was never picked up by any of those companies who mass market new inventions. It seems their doctors and lawyers took exception to removing a layer of dermis in a painful manner with a rusty tool from the garage. Go figure!

Etymology: Pimple (zit;acne) & Implement (tool,instrument)

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Skimprovise

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: SKIM-pro-vyz

Sentence: Even at risk of life and limb in using tools and devices dangerously to save a few pennies, Maribel would often skimprovise, sometimes even endangering those around her.

Etymology: Blend of 'skimp' (To provide for or supply inadequately; be stingy with) and 'improvise' (to make, provide, or arrange from whatever materials are readily available)

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Bioactinomaniac

RightOnTheWin

Created by: RightOnTheWin

Pronunciation: {Bi-o\act-in-no\maine-knee-ack}

Sentence: He knew his obsession would overwhelm him as he encountered the octopus; he immediately allowed his bioactinomaniac habits to control him, and began cutting up the octopus with his finger nails.

Etymology: bio:living organisms. actino: having rays, radiating spines, or tentacles. maniac:one with an obession.

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Limplement

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lim ple ment

Sentence: Eileen was attemting to use her recycled saw to trim her nose hairs. Unfortunately, it slipped and severed her leg, making it a limplement. She now spells her name I-Lean...

Etymology: Limb (arm or leg or tree branch) & Implement (tool, device, instrument)

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COMMENTS:

Are you sure her name wasn't Noeleen? - galwaywegian, 2013-07-04: 07:29:00

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Overtool

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: ōvərtoōl

Sentence: Hal likes to overtool every thing he does. He shaves in the morning with a machete that he sharpens and hones for 20 minutes. He mows his half-acre lawn with a combine after mixing cocktails in a Hobart 20-quart commercial mixer. He doesn’t see his numerous trips to the ER as an indication that he should change, just as a source of stories to share at the local hardware store.

Etymology: overkill (the amount by which destruction or the capacity for destruction exceeds what is necessary) + tool (a device or implement, esp. one held in the hand, used to carry out a particular function)

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COMMENTS:

RightOnTheWin Really neat concept ! - RightOnTheWin, 2010-09-21: 09:33:00

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Mchammer

Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: mik - ham - mer

Sentence: Donald decided to mchammer his dog house together with his mchammer. It was a new tool that he created using a baseball bat, a visegrip and a socket wrench....Instead of hitting the nail on the head, he destroyed the entire dog house with his "hammer time"... Oh well, Donald thought as he put down the bat...."can't touch this" as a hammer again....must take up baseball.

Etymology: hammer, McDonalds, M C Hammer....

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COMMENTS:

Really hammered this one! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 14:13:00

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Twingineering

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: /TWNJNRNK/

Sentence: Carol's use of the wiffleball bat, a feral cat, and 22 binder clips in her perverse twingineering experiment resulted in the summoning of no less than three ambulances to attend to the neighbor who was mistaken for a burglar.

Etymology: twin + engineering (as if you hadn't already figured that out...)

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COMMENTS:

terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-09: 13:53:00

got a big laugh from the things you chose to twingineer. Excellent word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 14:15:00

Good word. - kateinkorea, 2009-03-09: 18:42:00

I twin-ge with laughter! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:55:00

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Megatool

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: megətoōl

Sentence: Gene believes in the megatool approach to life. If a task requires the use of a tool bigger is always better. He has a military surplus flame thrower that he uses to start his charcoal grill. You have a rusty bolt? If his jaws-of-life can't loosen it, they can lop it off so you can replace it. His wife drew the line when he started talking about a pneumatic hammer fly swatter. She has 911 on speed-dial.

Etymology: mega (very large; huge) + tool (a device or implement, esp. one held in the hand, used to carry out a particular function)

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COMMENTS:

Perhaps Gene is a megatool for Black & Decker. - otherguy, 2009-03-09: 06:43:00

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Toolfoolery

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: tool + fool +uree

Sentence: It is toolfoolery to think that you can use a rezorblade as a screwdriver, a wrench as a hammer or a chainsaw as a scissors. Injury can often occur and body parts can be broken, mangled or lost.

Etymology: Tool + Fool + Tomfoolery >> Tool (A device or process that is used to do some kind of work) Fool (a person who lacks good judgment) Tomfoolery (folly: foolish or senseless behavior)

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COMMENTS:

Love the way it captures the way we go toolin' around. Excellent creation! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 11:11:00

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Insinkerjuicer

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: IN-sinker-juicer

Sentence: Darren, tired of cleaning the fibrous mess from his juicer, cobbled together a weird attachment for his garbage disposal unitt so that he could extract his favourite vegetable and fruit juices while the leftover bits simply disappeared down the sink. Being an ardent greenie, he also plumbed the outlet so that the watery mass of vegetable matter was washed into the compost bin.

Etymology: Insinkerator (garbage disposal) + juicer

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Implementationized

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Im-ple-men-ta-shun-eye-zd

Sentence: She could not find the right tool, so she implementationized a sum of parts together to make a tool for what she needed to do.

Etymology: implement: a type of tool and then added tationized...to put together to make one useful object as a tool. :)

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Innovention

Created by: kalex

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Electrocutilize

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: ee lek tro CYU til ize

Sentence: Stumpy likes to electrocutilize power tools for more mundane purposes. Last year, he electrocutilized his belt sander to polish his shoes - while he was still wearing them. That's why his nickname is Stumpy.

Etymology: electrocute + utilize

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Overskilsaw

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: oh-ver-skil-saw

Sentence: Susan is not one to shy away from a challenge. Her father always told her, "if something doesn't work don't force it, get a bigger hammer". With that in mind Susan goes after her "need-to-be-trimmed" nails with her overskilsaw.

Etymology: overkill (an excess of what is required or suitable, as because of zeal or misjudgment) + Skilsaw (popular brand of circular saw)

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Oooooooooohtensil

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ooooooooooh ten sihl

Sentence: with one quick twist of the pliers and the addition of an electric motor. the kitchen utensil became an oooooooooooohtensil.

Etymology: utensil, oooooooooh

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-03-09: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2009-03-09: 02:27:00
Thank YOU, James Gang...for the excellent illustrations! ARS LONGA VITA BREVIS! MetrohumanX

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-03-09: 11:02:00
And thank you metrohumanx, for supplying so many wonderfully prickly ideas! ~ James

yellowbird - 2009-03-09: 20:52:00
Just the cartoon made me smile. No need to read the words today!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-20: 00:53:00
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James

'My nose hairs are scary!'

DEFINITION: n. A tool which has been re-purposed and is now being used (perhaps unsafely) to perform a completely different function. v. To use a tool for a different purpose than for which it was originally designed.

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